America's Next Top Model

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Crouching Tyra, Hidden Drag Queen

Backstage, Nicole tells Kara, who's in the makeup chair, that when she has smoky eyes her eyes look burnt. Okay, so maybe she does have the social graces of a fetus. Or maybe it's a warning. Kara laughs in her face, and once again complains about how well Nicole is doing. She says that if Nicole is doing well in this competition, that she's obviously going to suck, because she's nothing like Nicole. Nicole again says that Kara looks like her face got burnt to a crisp. Sundai just blinks rapidly, says "wow," and makes a mental note to remove all matches from the house. Kara is next with the sword, and tells us that she doesn't care for weapons at all. Except when they're used to cut off sheep testicles. Kara's performance is a bit messy, and Jay calls her out on not listening to Deborah's weapons instruction. He tells her that the grace is in those movements. Up in the air, Kara tells us that whatever she did wasn't going to look good. That's the attitude. Jay reiterates that her performance was weak.

Next up is Brittany, who looks especially awkward on the wire. Jay tell us that she was the most uncoordinated girl of the day and moved like a floppy fish. However, on film she looked brilliant -- strong and dynamic. She blew Jay off his seat, which I think is a familiar feeling to him. Rae is up next, and Jay notes that she's a beautiful person who lights up a room. However, Rae can't project that light onto film. At least not while hanging by her crotch and wielding an ancient weapon. Pity, that. Sundai is next and wants double swords. Jay says that there's nothing graceful about her on-the-ground performance. Sundai reiterates how hard it was to perform in the air, and appears to flounder. Jay tells us that her performance was abysmal and like remedial modeling. Short bus! This is not where she should be at this point in the competition. With that, the shoot is over, and no blood was spilt. Darn.

Back at the house, the girls compare harness wounds. It's bad news. Sundai tells us that she's nervous about panel, since in addition to her photo shoot being a mess she also got eliminated from the go-see challenge for being late. With a worried look on her face, we head to commercials.

When we return, it's panel time! There are prizes, there are judges. Supermodel Jessica White is the guest judge. There is no mention of her being short. Jennifer is up first, and Nigel says that her shot -- which contains three poses composited together -- is fantastic and shows power and invigoration. His one complaint is that she shrunk her body a little bit. However, Jessica doesn't think she needs to look all that tall in the photos, since they're about movement. Miss J. agrees. Rae is next. Nigel tells her that he sees motion and movement in her photo, but it's not fluid. Tyra tells her that her poses are more modelesque, while Jennifer looked like a character in a movie. It's a mediocre performance. Erin is next and Tyra loves her airbound central picture in particular. She has a great body pose, and her face is relaxed. Nigel says that she was a bit awkward with the weapons, but it caused her to get a different -- and good -- look of confusion on her face. These are some of his favorite pictures of her.

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America's Next Top Model

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