America's Next Top Model
Planes, Trains and Slow Automobiles

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5 A.M. in Amsterdam

Analeigh is next. Everyone loves her photo. She's using the wind and grabbing the rope and looking like a beautiful pirate. She's happy. Then there's McKey. Tyra tells her that she looks like a fashion show. She asks if the outfit that she's wearing is one that she won in the challenge. McKey clarifies that she won the challenge, but this is in fact her own outfit. Tyra asks, "This is in your...luggage?" McKey says that, in fact, this is just the kind of thing she wears to school. At Ye Olde Dominatrix College. Seriously? Tyra actually likes the outfit. When you take into account the stuff that Tyra wears to panel each week, this all starts to make sense. Nigel wants McKey to make him her fancy boy. McKey's best shot is, in fact, pretty great. Her legs look like they're about 13 miles long. Tyra says that everything is working perfectly.

Then there's Marjorie. Paulina thinks that her shot is gorgeous. Nigel likes it, but for the weird stumpy hand coming out of her back. Couldn't you actually imagine having a third little nubby hand coming right out of her lower back? Miss J. tells everyone that Marjorie lost her mind at the Red Light District challenge, in a very good way. He says he was screaming on the sidewalk. I imagine that isn't an unusual occurrence. Daphne notes that, although she's been hearing all these good things about Marjorie, she appears to be very shy and timid in person. The judges are all, "Girl, let us tell you all about it." Daphne asks Marjorie if she even wants to be there. Marjorie says that she does, but she is just trying not to spazz out.

Finally we have Samantha, who looks like she's going on an interview at Coldstone Creamery. Sam acknowledges that she has fashion issues. Tyra tries to fix her ensemble, but for the first time actually can't help her. Miss J. takes off his pants to give to her. McKey is really riling everyone up today with all that chain mail, isn't she? Nigel thinks that Sam has done all the right things in her picture, and the rest of the judges seem to like it, too. We head to commercials as the girls learn that one of them will be getting thrown overboard.

And then it's time for Top Models in Action. Hey! It's Katarzyna! She's signed with Elite! Girl, she looks fierce. But I'm pretty sure no one can pronounce her name properly. Still.

The judges deliberate. Elina's picture is high fashion, according to Nigel, but Daphne doesn't think it's very good. Paulina likes Elina even though she doesn't dig the picture, but Nigel doesn't like Elina even though he does like the picture. He also thinks that she's dull in person, and adds that he's not attracted to her. It must be all that inside ugliness coming out. Sheena's face is fantastic, but there's no life to her shot. She needs to find the balance between being too sexy and being flat. McKey has done beautiful shots before, but this week's is one of her best. Her legs go on for miles and she's like a giant. Miss J. loves Analeigh's shot and Paulina adds that she's improving as a model every week. Nigel is not a fan of Marjorie's photo. Daphne adds that she's like Bambi in real life, all gangly and shaky. However, Daphne likes that she can transform her personality in photos. Tyra likes that Marjorie has continued with the Hunchback of Notre Dame theme. Samantha had a great photo, even if she's busted in person. If you dress her right and do her hair right, says Nigel, you've got a model. The judges have reached a decision.

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America's Next Top Model

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