America's Next Top Model
Season 17, Highlights

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Leftover Ladies

The girls then had an actually cool photo shoot on stilts. Bianca has an extreme fear of heights, even the not very high heights of being on stilts. She was happy just to get up there, even though Jay basically told her she did a shitty job. But it was Isis who allegedly didn't bring her typical charisma to the shoot. She was eliminated while wearing a really unfortunate hat.

Next, the girls had a challenge to audition for a bit part on CSI with the show's creator, Anthony Zuiker. He was weird and kind of awesome. The girls had to say all sorts of difficult words, which led Bianca to improvise that the dead guy in the morgue had overdosed on Neosporin. Could happen, I suppose. Bre has a command of the English language, and won the challenge, while Lisa bombed and had a bunch of excuses for it. And everyone knows how Tyra feels about excuses! At the photo shoot, the girls modeled horrible clothes from Express, along with three hot dudes. Since a job with Express is one of the winner's prizes, the girls felt extra pressure to impress. Camille wanted the scenario of her shoot to be that she had two security guards protecting her as she headed to a big time event of a rock star turned painter. I mean, I guess she has a mind for detail. And then she fell down the stairs. Camille's photo, as well as Camille herself, lacked personality, and she fell next to the size ten boot of elimination.

In other unsurprising never before seen news, the model house was a pit of filth! Bre tried to get Bianca to do her part in cleaning the kitchen. Bianca understood the importance of cleaning generally, but pointed out that she doesn't actually eat out of dishes. As proof, we see her eating from a paper towel. But...what about, like, chili? That would be a great Bounty ad, actually -- just Bianca spooning chili into her mouth from a paper towel. Bre tells us that, if you are not Bianca's mother or her man, she is not doing nothing for you. Basically, Bianca is not cleaning up your dishes. I think that's actually an appropriate response. Bre, however, says that everyone is in this together. She's, like, way too nice and accommodating to be Bianca's friend. Or maybe that's why it works so well? Bianca reiterates that she does not eat out of dishes, and so does not clean dishes. Bre plans to put her in a headlock while she sleeps and throw her in the dishwasher. Don't you just imagine two long legs and the end of a weave sticking out at all angles?

The girls had a challenge in which they modeled designs from the Kardashian Kollection, complete with an appearance from Kim, Khloe and Kourtney themselves. Kim Kardashian's butt turned Angelea gay. In her words, "I wanna squeeze that." Whatever you may say about Kim Kardashian, I think we can all agree that her butt is truly a thing of wonder. After Lisa and Bre won the challenge, Bianca had a meltdown in which she complained about none of the other girls working as hard as she does, and told Miss J. that she walked away from many a confrontation. Miss J., always cognizant of what makes a good show, told her that that was her problem. While all this was happening, Bianca called Shannon a crying Christian like 100 times. Shannon didn't take well to this, which in turn caused Bianca to tell Lisa to mind her business. There really is a cause and effect chain there that makes sense. Oh! And then in a never before seen clip, we see Shannon tell someone in production that she's starting to worry about her safety! Hahahaha. She's such a nerd. I wish that Bianca had punched her in the throat just for that alone.

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America's Next Top Model




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