America's Next Top Model

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Sticks in the Mud

Tyra points to the word "piel" on a whiteboard, and explains that it means "skin" in Spanish. I guess she's trying to prove to us how trilingual she is. She wants to talk to the girls about having tough skin. If you can believe it, there is all kinds of crazy stuff about Tyra on the Internet. I know, right? It's hard to believe! And it still hurts her. Victory! All of our efforts are not for naught. She asks the girls how sensitive or not sensitive they are. Alexandria says that she's tough as a diamond, which is the toughest thing you can be. I would like to see raw video footage of her toughness when she watches her housemates go through her diary. Alexandria tells us that throughout her life there's been every kind of abuse that you can imagine -- physical, verbal and mental. I can think of others, which I hope she hasn't actually been through. She tells us that all that abuse has made her strong, and prepared her for this. I can see the argument that only a life of constant abuse could prepare you to be a contestant on this show. Tyra asks the girls to think about whether they're ready to really go out there and put themselves in front of the entire world. Shouldn't she have had this discussion at casting week? The world throws roses and darts. And every rose has its thorn, so even that end of things might be prickly. Tyra says she hopes this was helpful, and then tells the girls that they know who they are, and know how they're going to handle the world. Everyone still seems totally committed to being a famewhore.

And then! Molly's weave is gone! There's actually a flashback to Tyra telling Molly that her weave will be removed, which happened exactly four minutes ago. America's Next Top Model: assuming nothing about your short-term memory capabilities since 2003. Hannah gives Molly a quality head scratch, and Molly says that she's very happy to have the crazy animal weave off of her head. As Molly is bent over in head-scratching ecstasy, we get to see that she has a big-ass back tattoo. Meanwhile, Monique doesn't want to look at Hannah's best-of-week picture. She's mad that she didn't at least get called second. Monique wonders who will get sent home next. The pointed focus on her in this episode may give us some clues. Monique tells us that her hometown of Hebron, Illinois has only about 1200 people, and is known for winning the state basketball championship in 1952. She can't be a model in Hebron, and knows that she has enough ambition and drive to get the hell out of town. Or, quite possibly, she'll serve you a pretzel-wrapped hot dog at Auntie Anne's the next time you're in the Hebron Mall.

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America's Next Top Model

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