Potes was busy with her capoeira lesson, but she'll be back for the full recap. Teyona isn't a silent threat any more, she's been upgraded to an actual threat, in her own mind. Celia is still old. Allison says the final four is super-hard. Paulina brings the gals for a samba lesson, to make them effortlessly move their body and fake their modeling. Celia overworks it because she wants it too much. Paulina says she's desperate because she's so goddamned old. Aminat actually shows some expressions on her face. Allison looked scared. Teyona's got two left feet. Paulina not-so-subtly hints that they should rehearse their steps. The next morning Paulina does some hot samba moves with a dancer. She will be subtracting a million points for looking down. They get jewelry as a prize if they win. Shockingly, Celia wins, and Aminat looks more than a little irritated. Celia takes Allison with her for the prize and Paulina looks peeved that Celia didn't choose the runner-up.
Sutan and Christian wake the girls up for their photo shoot with the hair and makeup done in the house. They are then thrown on a bus way out into the jungle of Brazil. Tyra's photographing the gals and she wants fierceness and for them to look like birds. Allison has to be a "birdie owl/pterodactyl," and she has to protect her little birds. She tells Tyra she's really pretty. Aminat crouches up near a waterfall and has to learn how to wiggle her ears. Celia has to show more Amazon and less sex. A bat/moth attacks Tyra and Jay during their interview session. Teyona has to hug a tree. Then Tyra almost falls off a rock. At judging, Allison's shot looks great and Tyra was very proud. Miss J. talks in bird chirping. Teyona has a fabulous body, but it isn't her best shot. Celia shows her armpit and looks very strong. Aminat shocked Tyra with her wiggling ears. Everyone did well, they are all great, but someone has got to go home, so they nitpick, and Celia (or "America's Next Top Mother" according to Miss J) is sent packing. - Angel Cohn
Previously on America's Next Top Model: The girls got to don caftans at their go-sees with Brazilian designers, then hit the beach to pose with hairy fat guys and other assorted randoms. Fo had charm, but didn't work her teeny bikini-clad assets to the fullest and so was sent home. Four bitches remain! The three baddest bitches in America, and dormouse Allison.
It is night in Sao Paulo, and the girls return to their house after elimination. Teyona is feeling so great about getting called first that she busts out an, "Oh, snap!" when she sees her photo displayed as digital art in the house. She feels like she's getting better and better, and that in her bikini photo her girls are looking juicier and juicier. And by "her girls" she doesn't mean Aminat and Celia. Teyona is excited to be in the final four, and says that she's the one that the others need to look out for. Well, duh. Even with her Martha Raye Poli-Dent smile, she manages to trounce the others from week to week. Teyona continues that she used to be a silent threat, but she dropped the "silent" and is now a plain old threat. The others need to watch, because she's coming. And her teeth are detachable. Chomp chomp chomp.
Meanwhile, Allison tells Celia that her universally maligned bikini picture was rather cool. Celia agrees, and says nervously that it was just about her favorite one. They look at Teyona's winning picture, and Celia says that the set on that photo was easier to work with, and that Teyona is doing her favorite hand-over-head pose. Seems to me someone is eating sour prunes. Celia interviews that this was her second time being in the bottom two, and she was shocked that she got to stay. She thinks that the judges know that she's better than the performance that she gave. We cut to a sepia-toned flashback Tyra telling Celia that if she continues to give crap photos, all people are going to say about her is that she should go hang at the VFW with Grandpa Barney. Because she's old. Celia interviews that her biggest challenges are 1) her age; 2) not to be so stern with her photo shoots and challenges. She needs to relax both in face and in attitude. But not in bowels, because you can't shoot swimwear whilst sporting Depends.
Celia tries on a crazy outfit that is too big for her, and says it's pretty rad. Aminat interviews that they have to deal with Celia for another week, and that she can be "a bit much" and "annoying." Allison, however, is quite happy that Celia got to stay. She and Celia are good buddies, as evidenced by the fact that Celia takes photos of Allison with a pineapple on her head. What will these girls think of next? Allison tells us that Teyona and Aminat are equally close with each other, and we cut to them chatting in the hot tub. In other words, the friendship structures in this house are not like ebony and ivory, side by side on my piano keyboard.