To Robin, Jay chides, "You have real issues with your hair...You might as well go home and be Miss Soymilk or whatever." Not amused, Robin looks away and whispers, "Soybean," which Jay jumps on with the ouch-rageous, "Soybean, soy latte, whatever." Oh, snap! He must have been killer at telling that "iceberg, Goldberg" joke that seven-year-olds in Hebrew school so enjoyed back in the day. Email me if you want. But don't worry. It's a really stupid joke.

"Go through the bags. Revlon supplies the makeup." The competition is that they have to use the supplies they were given to take their faces "from day to night." In a flash, they're off to meet Derek Khan -- oh, fine. I was going to try not to but y'all forced my hand, so here we go: Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan! There. Feel better? -- who Tyra voices over is a "diva stylist." He walks them through the streets of New York from pricey store to pricey store, ending up at Guiseppe Zanotti. Elyse tells us that she and Adrianne had spent the entire day pretending they were rich (I know there are misgivings about them both sometimes, but they're totally the two I'd be chasing after this whole day to make them hang out with me, asking them if they wanted a bite of my sandwich. Trust me. They don't), and so it was quite a surprise to them when they arrive at the store and Robin throws down the plastic (not Jay's face, I mean her credit card) for a pair of $795 boots. Khan calls them "divine" and Robin voices over that she has to spend money on footwear because "your feet are what hold you up." Does that mean you also have to spend $795 buying vials of "the Lord's love"? Because I thought that's what held her up.