Tyra Mail. Someone will be eliminated tomorrow! No one wants to be eliminated. Eva says that she's come into this competition to win, and will leave wanting to win. Ann says that she wants to stay in the competition longer than Eva (yeah, good luck with that, Joe Namath) and wants Eva to be eliminated. That is so petty. Commercials.
And now it's time for an all-new Cover Girl Beauty Tip of the Week, starring a small orange man and a horsy foreign model.
[The setting is a salon. Techno music typically found in any gay disco underscores the action.]
Small Orange Man: [appearing to be tired with himself, even] Here comes another holiday party season.
Horsy Foreign Model: [with enthusiasm] I want to look my prettiest. Tell me how!
SOM: [thinking, "Finally, a monologue!"] It's all about red lips, especially color that outlasts the festivities. So try this Outlast Smoothwear. A brown-based red looks good on almost everyone. First, smooth on the rich color base coat, then seal it with the conditioning topcoat.
HFM: [pronouncing "must-have" like "moostof"] This is definitely a holiday party must-have!
And I can only imagine the scintillating conversation at that holiday party.
The judging panel. It's time for the tenth cut. There are prizes. There are judges. Janice, who is the epitome of '40s glamour (plus silicone!) tonight, calls the judges gorgeous. Kimono designer Kyoko Higa is the guest judge. Tyra says that there will be a test, which Nolé will administer. Nolé says, "You're gonna walk for the judges." Tyra adds, "In a Kyoko Higa design." Wait, that's all it takes to administer is a test -- to say, "You're gonna walk for the judges?" I want to be a test administrator! Poor Nolé, they never let him do anything, do they? Without Empress Minnie, he is a shell of a man. Tyra says that the girls must be fashionable yet respectful in their walks, according to local Japanese custom.