America's Next Top Model
America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B | 951 USERS: C+
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Tea And No Sympathy

Four tea-ceremony experts will be judging the girls. Eva says that they were very proper and upright. Yoko tells us that Eva made a mistake with the bowl or something. Eva interviews that the tea was green and frothy with little bits in it. Mmm, bits. Ann sits on a black line and drinks the wrong way out of the bowl. I don't know. This is so boring. Amanda can't walk in a kimono, and says that she was on "emotional shutdown" during the ceremony, and didn't want to cry. Seriously, what is her effing problem? I think that Amanda might -- and I am being totally serious -- have some sort of a mild mental disability. More so than Norelle, even. She just doesn't seem quite right. She asks what comprises the purple part of the sweet that she is given. NO TALKING DURING THE TEA CEREMONY! How great would it be if Yoko screamed that and started to whip her? Ha! Now THAT is what I call a ritual! Anyway, it's colored gelatin. The judges look at her as if to say, "NO TALKING DURING THE TEA CEREMONY!" but, sadly enough, they do not whip her.

And then, fucking Yaya, who says she felt relaxed and calm in front of the scroll and flower, which I guess are a part of the tea ceremony as well. She says she was overwhelmed "with this feeling of...wow." Yeah, me too. Wow. Norelle is next, and doesn't do so well. She has some sort of problem with the pad of paper that the sweet is on. I don't know. It's not that I don't have respeito for Japanese traditions and stuff, but when I tune into Top Model, I want to see tall, scantily clad women in catfights. The tea ceremony is just not doing it. The judges ask the girls how they are enjoying their time in Japan. Yaya answers in Japanese. Of course. Norelle can't understand the judges at first, and when she does, she says that it's different, and that she's having a hard time adjusting to the weather and the food, but that she likes it. Oh, Norelle. She's so great.

The winner of the tea ceremony is Yaya. Fucker. Eva says that it's a conspiracy. Yaya chooses Amanda to go with her. Amanda says more power to Yaya, since she is enjoying the fruits of Yaya's labor. Baby, sweet baby, if it's all the same, take the glory any day over the fame. Or over being associated with Yaya.

America's Next Top Model

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