America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: C- | 1 USERS: A+
Easy, Breezy, Tootieful

Jaslene opens the show, and Tyra says she's working it. Saleisha vows to bring it anew, and heads out on the runway. She says she loves the feeling she gets when she's on the runway. Chantal is next, and says she has nothing to lose and everything to gain. Her dress seems like it might be a tad more restrictive, and her walk is not quite as strong as Saleisha's. I must add that the clothes are truly gorgeous. The girls take another pass, which is more or less uneventful. On her third pass, Saleisha says she feels like a princess. You know what Chantal feels like on her third pass? A knocker-over of guy on stilts. Her very long train gets caught under a stilt, and the performer takes a serious fall. Chantal takes a minute and looks horrified, holding her long fake-fingered hand to her face and her chest. Part of being a top model is not caring if cheaply paid extras get any broken bones. You keep working, girl! With that, the show is over. Chantal is totally thrown, you can tell. Saleisha, however, is in her glory. We get another interview with Crying Chantal, trying to still sound happy. Saleisha tries to squeeze out another tear, again unsuccessfully, in her interview. Oh, give it up, Tootie.

And then, panel! Tyra tells the girls that they've come a long way and shown that they're the two strongest girls in the competition. I mean...really? I guess it was a pretty weak field. There are prizes -- a contract with Elite, a cover and six-page spread in Seventeen, and a $100,000 contract with Cover Girl. And there are judges -- Nigel Barker, Miss J. "Giant Afro" Alexander, and Twiggy. It's time for a photo review. There was, of course, the effects-of-smoking shoot. Tyra stupidly says, "You guys remember that shoot? Didn't expect the first one to be so out there like that, did you?" She's so proud of herself. Chantal's modeling showed promise, while Saleisha did a good job of being beautiful and showing the negative side. Then there was the fashion gargoyle shoot. Chantal was naturally sexy, and Twiggy thinks that her shot was high fashion. Saleisha's shot was unique, and she made it her own. Tyra thinks that girls would look at the shots and say, "I want to be her," and guys would say, "I want to be with that." Apparently, the men in Tyra's life like to refer to women as "that," which might be where a lot of her issues stem from. Climb to the other side of the wall, Tyra, where you will find a personal pronoun. Then there's the Great Wall shoot, with Tyra as the photographer. Twiggy says that Saleisha's shot is her favorite of the competition, and Miss J. agrees that she took the city by storm. Chantal took full advantage of her figure and shape and dominated her picture. And that's it! Clearly, these two do not have such strong portfolios, or we might see a few more photos.

And then, we get a review of the girls' performance in the fashion show. Miss J. thinks that Chantal takes short, quick baby-doll steps. She didn't seem like she was owning the space or the clothes. Saleisha, on the other hand, owned it, and had confidence. Twiggy thinks Saleisha seemed like she's been on the runway all her life and looked amazing. Chantal started out confident, but nerves got to her. Nigel agrees with the others that Saleisha has her walk down. Chantal also looked fantastic, but tended to slip in and out of it. Tyra asks how Chantal felt when the stilts guy fell over. Chantal says she knew she had to keep walking, but broke character because she wanted to go help him. See, being a good Samaritan gets you nowhere in this world. Tyra asks if she forgot that it happened, and Chantal says she tried, but felt really awful. Tyra thought that Saleisha's walk was strong and confident, but she got a little hoochie sway in the shoulders, and also had a little too much booty. We see Saleisha at the end of the runway waving her fake-fingered arm around like Freddy Krueger. Tyra says that Chantal's body was fantastic in the clothes, but was stiff like she had a stick in her butt. She needs to relax.

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America's Next Top Model




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