America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Breaks Down

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Breaking Down Is Hard to Do

The girls travel to the site of the commercial shoot, where they meet Tyra, who looks like a confetti factory vomited on her. Tyra tells the girls that Barcelona is the fashion capital of Spain. It is home to designers Custo Barcelona, Balenciaga, and big-lipped model Esther Cañadas. Tyra asks whether everyone's chosen a man, and Jaeda makes a face. She tells Tyra that Nacho said he doesn't like black girls. Tyra is mildly outraged, but then tells Jaeda that she's going to have to give Nacho a kiss to make him love black girls because once they go black, they don't go back. And I get and agree with the spirit of what she's saying, which is that you need to do your job first and worry about hating the creep afterward.

Tyra calls out Jay Manuel, who tells the girls that they'll be doing a shoot for Secret deodorant, which is all about displaying strength and confidence, especially when the pressure's on. Today they'll be celebrating the strength of Barcelona women by speaking in Catalan. And, as we will see in a few moments, by acting all slutty and such. The girls get made up and study their lines. Caridee says that she's feeling overwhelmed, and that having to memorize lines in a language that she's never even heard of is the hardest thing she's had to do in her life. Michelle interviews that she was sure everyone was going to make a big deal about her having to kiss a dude, but she says that she was more worried about the language than the kiss. Leave it to Michelle to evoke an Indigo Girls song without even trying. That's what happens when you come out. Let me take this moment to note that Jay is the color of strange fire today.

Jay introduces the girls to director Denis Rovira. The premise of the commercial is that the girls walk through a cadre of sexy guys, telling little secrets along the way, and then they have a big secret at the end. Michelle is first. She walks through speaking slowly. She whispers something in the ear of one guy, then sees another guy with a guitar and says something about "musica funky." Heh. Michelle interviews that you go in thinking that you know what you want to say, but when you have the script half-memorized and then see the words on the cue cards, it is completely different. Michelle ends up with her last guy and says something that translates to "What's my secret? I enjoy that your face is oddly reminiscent of Ellen DeGeneres" before kissing him. The kiss isn't too bad. Jay says that he was expecting the kiss to be horrendous, but it was actually the best part about the whole thing. Michelle was apparently giving the camera the cold shoulder.

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America's Next Top Model

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