America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Cheated

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A Lump In His Haute

Cereminato Eliminato. IMG. Jane. Sephora. Try the eye cream. It's amazing. Judges. Stephen Fairchild is the guest, and he administers the individual evaluations this week: "What we'd like to do is pretend you just got off a plane in Italy." Are there heads Photoshopped onto construction paper? Because that, they might be able to imagine. "All you have is the pants you're wearing, some shoes, and a t-shirt. From the plane, immediately you're gonna go to a wicked party." Along with the t-shirts, we're told, they also have scissors, ribbon, safety pins, and pens. I'm sorry, did their carry-on luggage get accidentally switched with MacGyver's? But never mind, as they are all given blue shirts that they have to reimagine. As blue shirts with dry-erase marks on them.

Shandi goes first, explaining that she cut off one of the shoulders to show some skin, but not in a penetrative sex kind of way. She also tied a black ribbon around her neck. Tyra digs it, Nigel calls her "inspirational," Janice compliments her shoulders, and Eric is going to go to a movie with Lauren.

Yoanna is up next, and she explains that she wanted something "simple and classic," so to that end ties a ribbon around her left shoulder like she's campaigning to raise awareness for midriff rights or something. Janice thinks it looks like a straitjacket. Nigel wants Yoanna to take it somewhere "sexual." No, he doesn't. He wants her in a potato sack. But he doesn't want her to be allowed to eat potatoes.

April has made what looks like two shirts into a top and a bottom and has cut a wide swath of fabric out of one side of the shirt. Janice thinks it's more of a nightclub look. Weren't they going to a party? I forgot the plot of the challenge. Does Shandi totally f MacGyver? Drawing a blank, here.

Mercedes gets a Janice "A+" for her shirt, which Mercedes made into a plunging neckline jobby with shoulder straps. It does look pretty good, I have to say. Tyra thinks it looks like a real designer did it. Stephen wants Mercedes to come work for him. ["But to come cut for him, he is careful to say, not model. Because he doesn't want her as a model." -- Wing Chun] Mercedes offers what I think she thinks sounds like "grazie," I think.

Tyra reintroduces us to the lovely pictures they took on Lake Como, and I swear you can hear the laughter from the panel. Someone please tell me I'm right? Shandi and Yoanna step forward first, and are shown their best picture. Nigel calls it "very Helmut Newton-esque," and if you don't know what that means, I remember five minutes ago when I didn't really, either. Janice thinks Yoanna looks fantastic, but there is a consensus that Shandi's face looks a little pained. Mercedes and April look like "sisters," but Tyra worries that April overdirected the shoot. Janice warns not to do that, because "they don't like it." Janice? Have you ever cheated on anyone?

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America's Next Top Model

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