Cindi sits and gets right to her lesson: "That journalist is there for a story...if you mess up, fess up." She cautions them that lying will only make it worse when the truth of the story comes out. She cautions them to trust the publicist. She cautions them "that the public is very forgiving." She cautions them that Hollywood is made of pink sugar and unicorns, and that all you need to make it there is a great idea and some heart and, by gum, the gates of the city will open wide and embrace you with a sun-dappled hug. Honestly, Cindi, don't lie. If a journalist comes in with an agenda and wants to get a certain story, they'll take anything you say and do a write-around until your words don't sound like they're coming from you. They'll fact-check selectively and verify unnamed unreliable sources by confirming the information with other unnamed unreliable sources. They will selectively edit reality, which is something all of us here already know a little bit about from, well, watching this show. And after the press turns on you, good luck banking on the "forgiveness" of a cynical and savvier-than-the-publicist-thinks American public, who is gorged on a twenty-four hour news cycle and really not that interested in hearing carefully worded apologies from coddled millionaires who blew it. Cindi should tell them just to go on doing what they do, and we as a public will elevate them to a place we feel is appropriate for their skill set, until we've had enough and decide it's time to bring them down. Don't worry. We'll let you know when that is. You hear us knockin', Rosie O'Donnell, Mariah Carey, and Sharon Stone?
Tyra piles on to the discussion, telling the girls to impassioned nods and actual scratches of pen on paper: "Celebrity, to me, is like being the popular kids in school. Everybody wants to know them and be like them and touch them, but at the same time you want to talk about them to break them down." When did she get indoctrinated into The Plastics? Each of the girls is then sent to conduct an individual interview with Cindi, Elyse telling us, "The premise is that you're supposed to tell the publicist everything." Such as about Elyse's eating disorder, which is sneakily touched on again right here, when Robin tells us that she takes "little bites" of people's food. Elyse tells the group that she wants to order a pizza, and Robin deadpans, "Why? You [sic] not [sic] gonna [sic] eat [sic] none [sic]." Augh! Someone change the name of the book to Eats, Shoots & Prays. Anything to get her to learn how to speak this lovely language of ours even slightly.