This week is all about spokesmodeling and recyclable materials. Two great tastes that taste great together, I always like to say. Model Tyson Beckford comes to the house and makes the girls serve as spokesmodels for items from the kitchen. The word "moist" is used much too much for my liking. Tyson takes a bite out of Ambreal's mango, and that is not a euphemism. Heather drops the Asperger's act long enough to ride Tyson's jock for a little while and to look especially pretty and not at all awkward throughout the episode. The girls then put their spokesmodel skills to use as they divide into teams of three and create PSAs for Keep A Child Alive, the organization behind the "I am African" ads. Everyone kind of effs up, and Heather, Jenah, and Ambreal win, somewhat inexplicably. While Jenah and Ambreal get gift baskets, Heather is randomly drawn to do a photo shoot for beauty product company Carol's Daughter. The shoot is photographed by Matthew Rolston and art directed by Mary J. Blige, but the extent of Mary J.'s art directing seems to be the suggestion that Heather get a tan. I guess she took the whole "no more drama" thing to heart. Nonetheless, she's really nice to Heather and even begrudgingly lets Heather hug her. In a little closet slumber party, Ebony shocks the other girls by telling them she wants to go home. She means it, yo. The week's photo shoot is all about high-fashion recycling, which luckily does not mean that anyone has to wear Tyra's old Victoria's Secret shelf bralette. Rather, they each are representing a recyclable material. Heather, as aluminum cans, goes face-on to prove herself to the judges. Saleisha, quite hilariously, is "car parts." Bianca has learned to smile with her eyes, which gets big ups from Jay and the panel, while Ambreal has apparently forgotten how to model. At panel, Nigel wears one of Miss J.'s old fros, which is at least better than wearing one of Miss J.'s old jock straps. Unsurprisingly, it's Ebony and Ambreal in the final two. However...shocker! Tyra hands Ebony a photo, but Ebony tells her she doesn't want to be there. Tyra gives a self-righteous speech about quitters before turning everything around so that it was fate that Ambreal stayed in the competition. We end the episode with a bit from Ebony's casting video, which is I guess supposed to prove that she was a big waste of time, but really just demonstrates how much the show broke her spirit.
Previously on ANTM: Trampolines! Ice skating! High-fashion gargoyles! Would you expect less? Janet bit the dust and got sent home, which means that nine bitches remain.
We open the week with Ebony, noshing directly from the fridge, asking Jenah if her personality really sucks that much. Jenah says it all has to do with the way that she brings it at panel. Ebony interviews that she's at the bottom of the competition so far -- her pictures are terrible, she sucks at the challenges, and she's tired of going to panel and always getting tons of negative feedback. I will make two points: 1) Ebony has had a few good pictures; 2) She seems to be wearing one of Phylicia Rashad's cast-off dresses from The Cosby Show. I guess the producers wanted a fabric representation of her supposedly rancid insides. Ebony tells us that the judges don't like her personality, and so she's going to try to smile more and come off as a nice person. Ha! I love how they caught her basically admitting that she kind of sucks as a human being. Tyra totally hand-picked that clip herself. Jenah sums up the situation with a profound, "But...whatever."
Meanwhile, Ambreal talks to her dad. She tells us how terrible it was to be in the bottom two, but says that she's glad to still be there and have a chance to do better. Her dad tells her to be focused and not worried about having a good time all the time. Is Ambreal worried about having a good time any of the time? Ambreal tells her dad to pray for her. Girl, no offense, but believe me when I tell you that God could give two shits.
Meanwhile, Heather is stressing about the fact that she hasn't been able to give a good full-frontal shot. Well, it's hard when your strengths lie in the ass and the burgers. She tells us that from the minute she woke up, she was having a bad day, because she hadn't even realized that she was doing all those profile shots. Bianca, who really looks like she could care less, tells Heather that for the next shoot, she should give all front shots and no profiles. Bianca tells us that she's getting closer to some girls as the competition goes on, but she's keeping the competition "in front of her face" at all times. What this has to do with Heather, I couldn't tell you. Heather tells Bianca that she's practically hit rock bottom. This is obviously a girl who's never had a fellow contestant smear cooter juice on her. Why so dramatic, little Heaths?
Back inside, there is a knock at the door. Jenah runs to answer it, and finds Mr. Male Supermodel of the 1990s Tyson Beckford at the door. She is so instantly horny that she can't even speak. Hey, that's what Tyson does to you. He's like the chicken, but all dark meat. Speaking of, if you want to get lots of tattoos, take heed of the lessons learned from Mr. Beckford and don't do it in such a fashion that it just looks like you have really dirty arms all the time. Jenah calls all the girls together, and there is pandemonium. Or, rather, hormonedemonium. Ebony is waving her hands around like she just found Jesus. A suddenly Asperger's-less Heather interviews, "Eye candy. Yum."