America's Next Top Model

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Where Have All the Flowers Gone?

Heather and her subtle makeover are next. Twiggy thinks that Heather's weeds photo is very haunting, and it draws her in. Nigel says it's one of the best photos they've seen today, and is almost like art. Allllmost. Tyra likes that Heather blends in with the weeds, but doesn't get lost by them. Another banner week for Heather, and no mention of the Asperger's! Bianca is up next, and explains the debacle that led to her two looks. She throws her wig to Tyra, and Tyra says she looks like a model. Not drawing such raves is Bianca's sunflower photo. She is really a pretty terrible model. Tyra says that there is a regal beauty to Bianca that she doesn't realize yet, and she has to own it. She tells Bianca that Ambreal has a beautiful regalness that she should aspire to. At least this might prompt Bianca to get her spirit back and bitch-slap Ambreal around the hot tub.

Chantal is next. Twiggy doesn't like her face, and Chantal says that it was a challenging shoot. She explains the differing instructions of Jay and Lionel -- who, I think, she might not realize is the same guy who's sitting in front of her at panel. Tyra says that you can listen to the photographer and the art director at the same time, and that's the nature of being on a shoot. She tells Chantal that she's not at the top of the pack anymore, and Chantal looks like she's about to cry. For every model teardroplet, Tyra is one step closer to heaven. Finally, we have Ebony. Nigel tells her that she's a very beautiful girl and has everything it takes, but he's having a very hard time liking her as a person because she has very little charm. Tyra has Ebony take her seat and then does an Ebony impression, complete with the weird thing Ebony does with her mouth. Tyra says that Ebony's film blew her away, but that's not the only thing that makes a model. To which I say, don't break the girl down at casting and then be surprised when she seems cold and dead inside. You already made her tell the world that her mother's a crackhead. Isn't that enough?

And the Cover Girl of the Week is...Heather! She shines inside and out, just like WetSlicks.

The judges deliberate. Twiggy thinks Victoria's quite interesting to look at, but her attitude sucks. Nigel says that Victoria's problem is that even though she's smart, she's not wise -- you have to listen without talking back, and be charming. Sarah is beautiful, but she's losing weight, which could be a problem. Janet is too men's magazine-ish for Miss J., but Twiggy thinks there's a fashion model busting out. Jenah is awesome. Bianca looks like a wilted rotting sunflower according to Miss J., but Nigel says that with her shaved head, she's one of the strongest-looking girls in the bunch. Tyra thanks the fates that made her makeover go wrong. Guy loves Heather's eyes, and he thinks she can be a good model. Ambreal is a wilted rose for Twiggy, but Nigel likes the dramatic thing that's going on with her. Nigel says that Lisa has great bone structure and the camera loves her, but Twiggy thinks she's very safe. Miss J. thinks that Ebony should change her funky attitude, but Lionel says that she was perfect on the photo shoot. Something is missing with Chantal, according to Nigel. She has the pretty gene, but maybe not the model gene. Saleisha could have given a better picture, and Tyra says she's a big disappointment, and her vibrant nature doesn't translate to photos.

Eleven models stand before Tyra, but she only has ten photos in her hands. And these go to: Jenah and her funky weave, Sarah, Heather, Lisa, Janet Minnelli, Ambreal, Ebony, Bianca, and Chantal. This of course leaves Saleisha, who was never going to be in the bottom two, and Victoria. The judges love Victoria's atypical beauty, but not so much the prickly shade she's always throwing. Saleisha has captured the judges' interest after her makeover, but her pictures are just okay. But nonetheless, she gets another chance, and Victoria gets the prickly shaft. She immediately takes off her high heels and gives a big hug to Saleisha and Tyra. Tyra tells her that it's important to listen to what seasoned people have to say without talking back. Unless they are seasoned with nutmeg, in which case you can give them as much attitude as you want.

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America's Next Top Model

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