America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Has Surgery

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Down At Snaggle Rock

It is 1:25 AM. and Joanie looks miserable. Like, MISERABLE. Cut to a confessional of her, looking like hell, and saying that she's been at the dentist for twelve hours. Dear Lord. I guess God didn't like the whole amateur stripping thing so much, did He? We see Joanie getting out of the dentist's chair at 3:31 AM. She continues to confessionalize that she has to deal with it all day tomorrow, and then says, "Look at my teeth," as she gets all close to the camera and points to them. I love how they made her do a confessional, while looking like the monster who loved candy too much. Commercials.

And speaking of teeth, it's Nicole's Life as a Cover Girl. She's going to be walking in the ElleGirl show at fashion week. She goes for a fitting. She loves her Cover Girl Clean Liquid makeup, because it's so natural. Hey, just like her!

When we return, Joanie is on the phone recounting the horror of her trip to the dentist with her mom. She says that she has hillbilly teeth, and interviews that she's exhausted. Joanie's mom tells her to forget her mouth, because it's time to compete. Beaver County, represent!

Meanwhile, John gives Nnenna a massage. He says that he's going to pray for her every single day. Nnenna says that she was happy to see John, because he really needed to see her, and she thinks the visit will help him. John tells Nnenna to let him know whether there's anything he can do for her. Yes, go away. Jesus. John and Jade's mom leave. Sara notes that Jade showed a sweet side when her mom was there, and says that she needs to show that side to the judges. As John leaves, Nnenna says that she loves him. She interviews that she hasn't taken herself out of the competition for a moment because of the situation with John. She's taken me out of my mind with boredom, if that's any help.

Tyra Mail! "There's no lifeguard on duty, but there are divas." For shame, that they don't recognize No Lifeguard On Duty, the title of Janice Dickinson's first volume of memoirs! "Divas" being pronounced like "divers" would be if you lived in Massachusetts. Because it's punny!

The girls head to Club Mood, where they see Janice Dickinson and Eva Pigford, winner of ANTM Cycle 3. They are posing with Marc Ecko, fashion designer, who has come out with a new line of accessories. Eva looks pretty good, but Janice is a star. A fucking crazy star, but still. Marc's doing a shoot for (the recently defunct) ElleGirl, for which Janice and Eva are posing. The girls get to do a little group talk with each of them. Someone asks Eva how life is post-Top Model. Don't they watch the Where Are They Now specials? Or BET? Eva says that it's good, and tells the girls that if they exude confidence, they'll help themselves out. She tells them to stay beautiful, and takes her leave. Brooke says that the advice to pretend to be confident, even if you don't actually feel confident, resonated with her.

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America's Next Top Model




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