America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Hates Her Hair

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I Just Called To Say "I Hate You"

When the girls enter their house, who but Miss Tyra Banks is waiting for them. The girls all scream and shriek, and the volume goes up a full decibel when they discover that a full-scale Frederic Fekkai Salon has been transplanted into their living room. Frederic Fekkai is there, as are the Jays, who apparently utilized some sort of space-age travel to get there well before the girls. We can only hope that one day their newfangled mode of transport goes horribly, horribly wrong.

Tyra tells the girls what their new looks will be. As she does this, she also whips a curtain off of a sketch that shows each girl with her new look. It kind of looks like one of those sketches that you get in that weird booth at the mall. Melrose is going platinum blonde, à la the gorgeous Nadja Auerman. Brooke, who looks like she should be running for class president, is going an edgy chocolate brown. Eugena thinks she is better than everybody else, so she is getting lots and lots of extensions. Megan is staying pixie but going blonde. Anchal is getting some layers and a little bit of length taken off, and with the aid of threaders is going from a twohead to a fivehead. Monique's hair...will kind of look the same. She, of course, voices over a complaint about this. Caridee is getting a big weave. A.J. will go lighter, with a cut that is similar but also echoes 1990 Linda Evangelista. Megg will get long frizzy extensions. Fitting. Michelle will go from mousy to fiery red with a little bit of wave. Amanda will get a slightly different shade of red, and her hair will stay super-straight.

And then there is Jaeda, who in Casting made the terrible mistake of calling herself the prettiest girl in school. Tyra tells her that, in this competition, she is actually the most handsome. Oh, backhanded compliment, how I love thee. Tyra says that the boyish quality of her face photographs very strong. To embrace that, Jaeda is going to get some Halle Berry hair. Jay, of course, brings back Jaeda's declaration earlier that morning. Tyra tells Jaeda that her modeling will have to change with the haircut, and thatshe's going to have to go totally against what she was raised to be. Unless she was raised to be a man, which is actually quite possible. Jaeda doesn't look too excited. The girls learn that they will get their new looks, and then pose in metallic bikinis. Classy!

Cut to Jaeda bawling and saying that she's never had her hair so short before, and doesn't know if she can pull it off. That's a legitimate fear, given what we see later in the episode. The nicer girls try to encourage her by telling her that it will look awesome. Sometimes lying is nice, and situationally appropriate. Meanwhile, Monique says that she doesn't want to look the same, and that they should chop her hair off. And her head, while they're at it.

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America's Next Top Model

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