And we have reached the point in the season when it is time for...acting! The girls head to a theater, where they meet one of the twins who had a show about being twins but aren't the Olsens who now, quite coincidentally, stars on a CW show. They have to wear crazy hats. Because acting is about crazy hats! Acting! They get two hours to memorize some dialogue, and then have to share the stage with none other than Efren "Pedro" Ramirez. There are no classic moments in the vein of "illsnesses," but, as usual, the acting challenge is always good for a laugh. Renee gets a challenge victory to go with her (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-oooh) new at-ti-tude, and picks Dionne to share in the prize. And I mean, really, who is Renee going to pick after the girls all said they hated her? Six of one, you know? Renee and Dionne think that they have won t-shirts, but in fact their real prize comes later as they receive visits from their families, including their kids. This warms the cockles of practically everyone's heart, including mine, but it also has the effect of making Natasha miss her baby even more. Sad times seem even sadder when they are presented in broken English. The photo shoot for the week brings back girls from past seasons who engage in recreation of scandalous moments -- you know, "Bitch stole my granola bars," "Flesheating bacteria," "Hey, twins!" etc. Everything seems to be going well until Dionne has to get a little freaky in the back of a limo with Season 5's Kim. The words "fucking lesbo" come into play, and for a while I was afraid that the good will engendered by "Wholahay" would be lost entirely. However, Dionne eventually admits that she kind of dug it, and wins back some points. Her photo is also awesome, and she, Natasha, and Brittany pull ahead of the pack. It's a sad day for Whitney the unphotogenic and Jael the speech-impaired, however, as they land in the bottom two. In the end, the third (fourth? I've lost count...) time in the bottom two is the charm for Whitney, and she's finally sent home with only Brittany's discarded weave to dry her tears.
Previously: Jael was stupid enough to piss off 50 Cent, who threw her into a pool fully clothed, and Natasha was doubly stupid enough to jump in the pool of her own volition. The two of them had to meet with super-manager Benny Medina while they were sopping wet. Trust me when I say that B. Med was not having that. Renee finally came to the realization that everyone hated her, and Tyra had a little "Hating Renee Roundtable" in which everyone put forth their reasons why. And, in an elimination that will surprise no one, Sarah went home. Seven bitches remain!
We begin with the girls in their big-ass limo, heading home from the last elimination. Whitney says that she wouldn't have bet on being in the bottom two tonight. Whitney apparently never actually looks at her own pictures. Or listens to what the judges say. I mean, I like the girl a lot, but it's becoming clear that she can't really model. Whitney tells us that she's going into this week full throttle. And, just like the sequel to the Charlie's Angels remake, the results are bound to be disappointing.
Meanwhile, Renee is listening to a recording of her husband saying that he loves her, and that he and their baby, Troy, miss her very much. Renee says that he's trying to cheer her up, but that she's feeling really depressed. Maybe he should try to cheer her up by not being homeless for a change. She says that she's done things to offend the girls, but that is not her intent. And I mean, I hope this rehabilitation thing works and all, but Renee knows that she's a bitch. I think she should drop the whole "Oh I didn't mean to offend you by saying your face looks like an asscrack" line of defense and just own it. Anyway, Renee is going to try to be more sensitive.
Jaslene interviews that, ever since they had the talk with Tyra, things actually have changed. Oh God, they're still talking about Renee? We cut to the kitchen, where Renee asks Dionne if she's making hot cocoa. Dionne interviews that, at this point, it's hard to trust Renee or believe anything that she says. This apparently includes her recipe for hot cocoa, since Dionne walks away from the stove as soon as Renee starts stirring it. You know Renee was like, "One tablespoon of rat poison keeps that weird skin from forming on top!" We then cut to Jael, who says that Renee wrote her a letter saying that she's sorry for the ways she's treated Jael and all the other girls. Jael interviews that she knows Renee is an actress and can turn it on and off, but that doesn't mean that she wasn't genuine in her apology. Jael puts the letter on her wall, perhaps next to the drawing of her in a straitjacket that Renee made the last time she went through personality rehab. Step 1 is Knowing You're A Bitch.