So, one of the twins comes out as maybe possibly potentially bi or gay or whatever. I think it's Michelle, but I still can't tell them apart. The girls get lessons from some Entertainment Tonight Ken doll on how to interview people. And then they have to practice their newfound skills on Janice Dickinson. I expected to be thrilled to see her, but she's still dead to me for cutting Andrew on her own show. Man, he was tasty. However, I do love that the girls insult Janice -- Caridee calls her stinky and Brooke calls her bitchy. Truth hurts, doesn't it, Janice? And a bird craps on her. I call that karma. Melrose wins the challenge, because she's the only one with a personality strong enough to stand up to La Janice. Her prize is to do some red-carpet interviewing for ET. We also get the patented Tyra therapy session with each girl. It's as boring as you might expect, although Melrose gets outed as a bitch and Caridee tells us that she once suffered from the heartbreak of psoriasis. Then Michelle comes out to her mom over the phone. (And I love that her mother can't tell the twins apart over the phone). But her mom is pretty great and mostly just tells her daughter how much she loves her. That was sweet. The big photo shoot involves the girls posing twice, once as each half of a celebrity couple (like Brad and Angelina or Oprah and Steadman). Like we need to see more pictures of Britney and K-Fed. The show demonstrates a sense of humor by making Michelle pose as Ellen and Portia. There's a judging challenge, which involves the girls giving commentary over some footage of an ANTM red-carpet event. Caridee, Brooke, and Melrose do fine, but the others all suck. The only really weak picture is A.J.'s, and she ends up going home. And then they announce that she was last week's Cover Girl of the Week. Heh.
Previously: the hate of the house transferred from the departed Monique to the sadly still remaining Melrose. A.J. turned heads and ate brains as a sexy cannibal in her photo shoot, while Megg and Jaeda struggled with their respective circus freak roles. In the end, Megg went home, and the world of rock n' roll braced itself for her ascension. Nine bitches are left, if you can believe it.
It is night. Caridee is plunking away on a guitar. Rock n' roll! Except not. It's a very mellow tune she's playing, perhaps as a eulogy for Megg. Somewhere Megg is all, "Dude, that sounds like the intro to 'Enter Sandman.' That's rad, man." I think that maybe Caridee is singing, too, but it's really hard to tell. Some other girls sit around, and one of them is perhaps contemplating why a finger-picked guitar makes her think of the Indigo Girls, and why thinking of the Indigo Girls makes her get all tingly inside. But we'll get to that in a minute. Jaeda says that being in the bottom two is depressing, and that she thinks she sucks. That makes four million and one of us. She was in the bottom two for the second time last week, and wonders what she's doing. Well, she's surely not styling her hair with any kind of talent, that's for sure.
A.J. tells us that, of the girls in the house, she was the closest to Megg, and that losing Megg is like losing a huge spirit. Like, the spirit of the teenager who died tragically in an electrical accident at a Van Halen concert in one of those Rock N' Roll High School meets teenage-ghost movies, but managed to haunt her friend into getting her GED (and winning the love of the school's resident dork, who, as it turns out, is secretly a guitar god), choosing to haunt most often while said friend and her pert bosoms took a shower. Clearly, the part of Megg would be played by Tatum O'Neal. We flash back to everyone crying when Megg left. Cut to present-day Melrose, who mocks them. She says that she cried like that when she almost went home herself, but that she's sure as hell not crying when anyone else goes home. She says that they can all go, because she's fine being by herself. Doesn't she realize that one is the loneliest number?
Meanwhile, it is day, and some of the girls are sitting around talking. Jaeda says to the twins that Michelle is the one who opens up more. She says that this doesn't mean she likes Amanda any less, which causes Eugena to pipe up to say, "I do!" It's bitchy, yet grammatically suspect enough to give you pause and just think she's kind of dumb. Eugena interviews that the twins are two different people -- Amanda is more self-conscious, while Michelle's outgoing. Jaeda then starts bouncing on the big bean bag chair Amanda's lying on and yelling, "I hate Amanda!!!!!!" Everyone laughs. Now, if Monique had done that, no one would have thought it was funny. Of course, she would have been whirling around pairs of her dirty underwear, which tends to take the lightheartedness out of such moments. Amanda interviews that when you're twins in a competition, everyone compares you a lot, which really sucks.