Boys! The girls go out with one of the male models from last week, and his friends. Sadly, there is no "You had SEX?!?!," but there is some smooching between Caridee and a Spaniard. Tyra talks to the girls about the harsh criticism they've gotten from the judges, and gives them a pep talk in which she says that, much like Christ Our Savior, she's going to sacrifice herself for them. I don't know what that means, except that Tyra's Oprah-like God Complex is growing. Hey, if Jesus were alive today, he'd totally have a talk show. And pose as part of Chingy's entourage. In other news, it's time for go-sees! As in other seasons, there is a strict time limit and some general confusion in getting from place to place. Eugena and Caridee team up with good results, whereas Amanda and Michelle team up and have no clue what they're doing. They are also late, and thus are disqualified from the challenge. Melrose remains alone, but denies that one is the loneliest number, while also proving herself frustratingly competent once again. She wins the challenge. And then it is time for someone to get maimed. Hooray! The girls have a photo shoot with a real live bull, in which they will be shot by Nigel. Caridee starts the day off well by asking Nigel if a stick he is holding was removed from his ass after the last judging. She apologizes, but he still seems pretty mad. At Panel, the girls have to tell the judges who they think has the most and least potential. Michelle breaks down and confesses that she might be the one with the least potential, in part because she doesn't know what she wants. Caridee reads a letter of thanks to the judges, which does not erase the memory of her bullish blunder. In the end, however, it comes down to Amanda and Michelle. I know! Cruelty. And then, quite sadly, it is Miss Michelle who goes home, because she doesn't want it, feel it, breathe it, or love it as much as her sister does. And in the end, she actually looks quite relieved about the whole thing.
Previously: ACTING! Michelle still didn't know what she wanted, and the girls packed their bags for a trip to Spain. They had to speak in Catalan, and sucked universally. Well, except for Melrose. And it pains me to report that. Jaeda especially sucked, however, and got sent back to the good old U.S.A., where people are more accepting of very high levels of testosterone and man-jaws.
We are still in Barcelona, where the streets are paved with racist male models. Caridee paces in the girls' beautiful apartment. She interviews that a part of her thought she was going home last week when she was in the bottom two, but that there was a stronger part of her that was saying that it wasn't her time to go. That is the part known as Carideenial. Caridee asks Michelle how many times she's been in the bottom two. The answer is twice. Caridee says, "Yikes," which is what I say as well. Michelle interviews that this is a really big learning experience for her. She doesn't know what she wants in life -- maybe it's modeling and maybe it's not. See, that is what I call a healthy outlook. ["If I wanted healthy, I would go to Whole Foods. I come to Top Model to see skinny bitches demented with unrealistic ambitions!"-- Wing Chun] Caridee says that she really wants this, and doesn't know what else she wants in life. I might suggest some sort of medication. I mean, it's all brain chemicals. There's no shame. We get yet another flashback to Caridee's stint in the bottom two. Was it really so dramatic that we need two flashbacks in the opening segment? She says that it felt good to get a photo, because she has worked her ass off in this competition. But not literally, which is a good thing, since Caridee's ass is one of the more endearing things about her.
It is then another day, or another time of the day. Who knows. Caridee says that she wants to get out of the house, and Melrose suggests that they call Luca. He lives on the second floor, you know. I think you've seen him before. Eugena explains that they called up the guys from the photo shoot. Minus the racist fuck, I would imagine. Melrose gets Luca on the phone and asks if he wants to accompany them to dinner. He replies, "Sure. Just don't ask me what it was!" Melrose interviews that, when she goes to a foreign country, she likes to have a nice dinner out and a glass of wine, or four. See, I totally thought she was going to say that she liked to experience the local flavor with some natives. And all she wants to do is eat and get wasted. Eh, I'm kind of down with that too, though. Melrose asks Luca to bring some friends, and ends the conversation with "Goodbye, sexy." He replies, "I walked into the door again."