America's Next Top Model
America's Next Top Model

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Potes: B+ | 593 USERS: C+
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Keenyah -- who is a jerk and fat and we GET IT -- tells Tyra that they are in a competition and that she doesn't want to do anything to put one of the other girls ahead of her. Tyra asks Keenyah about the competition in terms of body image, food, and pressure, and wonders if she eats from stress. Keenyah answers that she thinks she has an oral fixation, which I guess is why she sucks so much. She says that she engages in a lot of comfort eating. Tyra says that, for herself, she realized that she couldn't follow the starvation rules of the modeling industry and had to re-route her career from high-fashion to more mainstream modeling à la Victoria's Secret. Well, that plus the fact that Naomi Campbell kept threatening to cut her. And again, I know I joke a lot about Tyra's weight, but I think that she's kind of a genius in terms of molding her career so that she is a hundred times more famous than the anorexic fourteen-year-olds and aging supermodel has-beens that she no longer has to compete with while at the same time enjoying some delicious fried foods every now and then. She says that she could do this because she was already a high-fashion supermodel, but that Keenyah doesn't have that luxury and needs to eat healthy, which is important whether you're a model or not. Tyra tells Keenyah to focus on being healthy, and gives her a big hug.

Night falls. Tyra Mail! "Tomorrow it's double jeopardy. You'll need to draw on everything you've learned to get through the day. It's going to be difficult, so duck for cover. At 6:45 AM." Kahlen tells the others that they're going to have to draw ducks.

We arrive the next day at a set with a zebra-striped background and runway. We see Jay Manuel, who asks the girls if they're ready for a runway show. Jay is oranged to a crisp. Kahlen interviews that she's psyched because she feels confident about her walk. Jay tells them that they're actually not going to do a runway show, but rather a commercial. At this, Kahlen is not so excited, because acting isn't her thing. The commercial will be for Cover Girl's Outlast makeup. We then get a Jay-led almost commercial about how this makeup is the first of its kind and how Cover Girl has made it so easy with their two-step formula that makes your skin look beautiful all day long no matter the conditions. And I have actually tried makeup that's sort of similar in its claims to last all day, and it makes you feel like you have a film of motor oil on your face and gives you more zits than Britney. But maybe the revolutionary two-step formula corrects all of this in ways unknown. The commercial's premise is that we see a runway show and then cut to the backstage chaos. The girls will be doing a full thirty-second commercial as well as a print campaign. They meet director Russel Underhill and photographer Helmut Rautenbach, whom one might hope is as scarily German as his name indicates.

America's Next Top Model

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