America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Walks On Water

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | Grade It Now!
Naima Make You Scream-a

Kahlen walks, and Nigel asks if she holds her breath. She says that she does sometimes, and Tyra tells her to breathe, and to loosen up her face a bit. Janice tells Kahlen that she's never looked like she does in her ad, and that it "reeks Cover Girl." Nigel asks where the girl is who posed in the ad. They both love it. In an interesting turn of events, Tyra says that she doesn't like it and that it doesn't look like a cosmetic ad. Janice says that her ten-year-old daughter would want to go out and buy Cover Girl makeup, and thus I am reminded that Janice has a daughter, which makes me want to curl up into the fetal position and weep. Tyra thinks that Kahlen is smiling too hard. Janice reiterates that she loves it, because now she suddenly loves Kahlen. On her performance in the commercial, Nigel says that he loved her in the "quiet moments" when the camera wasn't actually focusing on her, and in those moments he couldn't take his eyes off of her. Unless it was to look at Naima, upon whom he has a huge crush. Flambé says that it was stale overall, and Tyra says that she didn't pop. She bids the girls adieu and there is a momentary shot of Tyra in her flutter sleeve shirt in which she appears so enormous that my mom says she looked like Rosie Grier. I think it's mostly the shirt, but still...yikes!

The judges deliberate. Nigel says that all of the girls have done extremely well, and that Naima truly showed sparkle in the Cover Girl commercial. Tyra agrees and says that this performance changed her mind about Naima. That and the fake tears. Janice angrily says that Naima came out of her shell today and was able to smile, but that a model needs more than that. I thought that Janice loved Naima. Maybe her silicone is leaking into her brain. Flambé isn't thrilled about Kahlen's picture, but Gretha thinks that she has the stuff to make it. Tyra says that she can stomp the runway and take a gorgeous picture, but that the thought of Kahlen as a spokesmodel scares her. Janice gives a "Spokesmodel? The fuck? Is this Star Seach circa 1983?" kind of look. And how hilarious would it be if the girls had to alternate throwing us into commercial breaks? Man, did I love Star Search in the day. Nigel says that Kahlen doesn't make an impression in person, and that angelic music should play every time a Cover Girl walks into the room. Nigel says that Keenyah nailed both the commercial and the shoot. Janice simultaneously yells and slurs, "She's not high-fashion! At all!" Nigel says that he agrees with Janice, and that this is his point. Gretha says that Keenyah is the most striking of the girls at first glance. Janice slurs, "Keenyah needs to lose weight. Keenyah needs to lose weight. Keenyah needs to lose weight." Tyra says that all of the girls have strengths and weaknesses, but that there can only be one winner. And it is not going to be Keenyah. Oops!

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America's Next Top Model




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