America's Next Top Model
The Girl Who Wants Out

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Make D'oh-ver

The girls head to hair and makeup, and just sort of lounge around topless. Destiny asks Maria what Kelly said to her at the makeovers, and Maria says, "She like bitched me out for not like taking their advice and not trusting them." And THEN she calls Kelly Cutrone a cunt. Allyssa and Destiny, both of whom seem like they are not inexperienced in worldly matters, are shocked. A) They love Kelly. B) See you next Tuesday! Destiny wonders how stupid Maria can actually be. I would actually really enjoy her own special brand of cuntiness and complete lack of respect for this show if she weren't so entirely devoid of humor. She's just not fun enough to claim for our side.

Bryanboy shows up for no real reason, and then we get to the shoot. Brittany is up first, kind of lying on a railing of some sort with Rob in front of her. Yowser! He really is like a Greek god. Johnny says that Brittany's new hair has transformed her from a little babydoll to a chic young woman. She leans against a tree and makes orgasm faces as Rob hovers over her. It's not a bad way to spend an afternoon, I'd say. Yvonne is next up, and says her chemistry with Rob is good, even though she kind of smashes his eyes when Tony tells her to try covering them up. Johnny says that Yvonne needs to know her body angles, and realize how she looks in certain positions. Work the curves and all. Laura shows up with her new blonde hair, and Johnny tells us that she crushed it.

And ha! Then we get the privilege of seeing a topless Victoria (with the tiniest little blurred parts!) eating and watching Maria, who is sulking in the corner. Victoria says that Maria needs to try giving a care. She is showing zero effort, whereas Victoria came to the shoot today with curly hair to show she's at least trying to impress someone (anyone) and show remorse for her non-makeover decision. Nastasia is up next, and does some sort of jumping pose with Rob. Leila falls into Rob's arms in the bushes, and Byranboy is very complimentary about how impressive she is. Allyssa looks sexy and intense, and both Johnny and Tony love it. Next up is Darian, who wets her hair in the nasty sedentary fountain just prior to her shoot. She knows that Kiara is looking on in the manner of a real bitch, to try to intimidate her. As Johnny and Tony tell Darian that her shot looks too romantic, Kiara notes that Darian seems unsure and is doing a weird mouth thing. That last part is true. Johnny acknowledges that Darian struggled, and needs to get out of her head a bit.

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America's Next Top Model

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