Tyra Mail! "Have you ever thought what it would be like to be a diva?" The girls do not take long to put two and five feet six and three-quarters inches together and realize that this means they will meet Miss Eva the Diva, winner of Season 3, who once charmed us and soon became a nuisance. The girls, especially Bre, are way too excited. Like, I'd understand if they were meeting Santa Claus or something, but seriously.
The next day, the girls travel by limo to the aptly named (if you have seen any recent shots of Miss The Diva) Poodle Parlor. There Eva poses on a chair wearing a long-ish, straight wig. Nik says, "We walk into, I guess, a photo shoot." "I guess," indeed. Bre says that she has admired Eva since the season she won. That is a hell of a way to waste a year of your life. Two ladies from the ubiquitous Elle Girl explain that Eva is doing the shoot for them and wearing some bohemian pieces by DKNY, the industry leader in bohemian. The girls watch Eva admiringly, and Kim says, "Oh my God, she's so cute. You just wanna...kiss her." Nik saunters up to Kim and puts her arm around her shoulder and says, "Ditto." It has gone from warm to bi-furious in no time at all! Also, see the note about Kyle at the end of the first paragraph. They tag team in saying, "Deliver us...from Eva." Lady-loving and original! Who could ask for more?
Eva pretends to be a model for a while longer. Kim says that Eva has been the most successful ANTM winner, so all of the girls want to watch her. Eva says, "Hello, pretty ladies," and tells them that she once stood where they stand, and knows what they're feeling. She knows what Kim's feeling, especially. With typical eloquence, Eva quoth, "You're here at work with me today and you get to see what the life of a Top Model winner really does [sic]!" Unless, of course, she comes down with a sudden illsness. She tells them that when they work, they'll have an entourage around them all the time, and so it's important to get along with other people. She introduces her entourage, who are with her all the time, and have still not made her get along with other people. One of them is her cousin. Eva tells the girls that they might consider getting a really good manager, and says that they are now commodities. Nicole says that it drives her to know that she could be standing in Eva's shoes one day. She calls Eva an inspiration. Buddha, Gandhi, Pigford.