Next up is Kristi (whose name, age and hometown are suspiciously not present on the screen), who is a twenty-year old republican and values her blonde hair. You guys? It's totally Jenna Bush. She feels like the only Republican in all of New York. She not only brags about, but -- quite unfortunately -- actually wears her hideous American-flag prom dress. "Yankee Doodle" plays in the background as Dandy Mrs. J. says, "I would have done a red sparkle shoe." Hee!

Nicole, age twenty-one and from North Dakota, works her bikini and confesses to being a drunken whore. Actually, she says she gets "loves everyone" when she drinks and gets "very friendly" with both men and women. Semantics. She feels that sexuality shouldn't be limited. Whatever. I've lost my senses and drunkenly made out with a few guys on more than one occasion and you don't see me making a political statement about it on national TV. In related front-page news, Nicole is now dating Cynthia Nixon.

Nargis is next, and she stumbles over the words in her crappy rehearsed speech. Nargis made it to the semi-finals last year, and can't believe that she's getting a second chance. Well, then she'd better make the most of it, right? She then says that she has no favorite or least favorite model (well do you?) and that she looks at modeling as "a job. And that's it." Because if there's one thing her experiences have taught her, it's that these judges love ambivalence.

Mrs. J. interviews that what he looks for most in the contestants is "good DNA." This cues Eva, who struts in looking like one totally crazy bitch. It's so great that she feels comfortable being herself in front of the judges! Tyra says that about 80\% (model, producer, statistician) of the other girls have something bad to say about Eva. Eva says they're all oversensitive. Tyra asks if there's a need to be nasty and negative. Eva says she isn't negative and nasty except when it comes to Amy, but that's because Amy looks like she just got back from the camps and it's disturbing. Slow-motion footage of Amy appears and you can hear a nation saying, "Point for Eva."

But that's not enough for Tyra, who says that she doesn't want to cast another black bitch. ["HA!" -- Wing Chun] Eva says that she is who she is and says what she thinks, but she doesn't actually want to hurt anyone's feelings. Tyra (in this segment known as "Dr. Fil" -- model, producer, psychiatrist) says, "I think you do." Tyra says that Eva knows how to hurt people because she's been hurt before. Who's hurt you, Eva? Who? Eva says that she's struggled and has only herself to rely on. That's why she wears this hard veneer! Don't you understand? Everyone's been mean to Eva -- her parents, father, brothers, classmates -- everyone!