America's Next Top Model
The Girls Go Bald

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Bald Fuggle

Then, Gina. Nigel says he knew her photo would turn out fantastic because she has great high cheekbones. It does look good. They don't mention her press-panel performance, interestingly enough.

Mollie Sue is next. Her photo makes her look like Season 3 Amanda. Tyra tells her that even though this photo is good, her film in general was so-so, and she shouldn't mistake squinting for intensity.

Furonda is next, and her photo looks crazy. Not crazy bad, just crazy. Twiggy and Tyra laud her eyes, but Nigel gives it to her straight and says that the photo isn't very good.

Wendy is next, and...oooh. Wendy in profile is a bad scene. The judges note that she looks very sad in the photo, but Nigel likes it because it is, at least, an emotion of some sort. Wendy sadly thanks him.

Nnenna is next, and she works it walking up to the panel, which is noted by Tyra. She does carry herself so well. Tyra notes that she was the challenge winner, and the judges clap. Her photo is fabulous, and the judges love it.

Then Kathy comes before panel, and Tyra says that the press panel folks noted that she has an awful accent and terrible posture. Tyra gives her a quick lesson in standing up straight. Kathy's photo lacks focused eyes, and Twiggy calls it a dead photograph. Tyra says it's sad because there is so much potential. Really, there is not potential, and Tyra just likes lying.

Next is Kari, whose head is HUGE. It's like an elongated bowling ball. I am not kidding. The baldness really emphasizes her giant features as well. Nigel says that she looks angelic, and Twiggy says she's got a great face. Tyra loves the picture.

Next is Leslie, who looks fierce, even though a hand seems to be coming out of nowhere and touching her right shoulder. I think it's her hand, but the way the photo is cut it looks crazy. The judges think it's very pretty, and Twiggy notes that she looks completely different in the photo, which is a good thing. Tyra tells her not to wear so much makeup to panel.

Last is Brooke, whose photo is horrible. J. says she looks like a manne-can't. Tyra tells her to figure out how to make her jaw look less enormous. This is becoming a theme. Commercials.

The judges deliberate. Nnenna is perfect and everyone loves her. Brooke's photo is terrible, but Twiggy says that she is better than her picture. Tyra says once again that the person on the street won't understand her face, but that her exaggerated features are what make her a great model. Danielle really stuck out to Nigel. Gina has dead eyes but great bones, and her personality is in question. Tyra also thinks that Mollie Sue has no personality, but Nigel thinks there's something sexy about her. Nigel thinks that there's something sexy about lemongrass. Kathy doesn't have a model's face, according to Twiggy, but Tyra thinks she photographs well. Miss J. says that Kathy is a hillbilly with a philosophy: that she can win the competition by being sweet, southern, and just a bit different. Miss J. calls Sara his 6'1" Scarlett Johansson. Twiggy says that she's divine. Tyra thinks Joanie is a model in her photos, even though she's kind of meh in person. Furonda's name is ferocious, according to Miss J. Tyra doesn't like the picture and Nigel misquotes, "Furonda! Call home!" Tyra buries her face in her hands. Nigel says that Furonda's photo is very alien. Leslie has beautiful eyes and is exotic, but her hands look a bit scaly, according to Miss J. Miss J. really needs to look in the mirror one of these days. Nigel, proving that misquoting is better than original quoting, says that Kari has gone "from Goldilocks to Baldilocks." I think he's drunk. Tyra says that Kari's eyes and mouth save her. Nigel likes Wendy's sadness, and Tyra explains to the panel about Wendy's situation. They are surprised. Twiggy asks if Wendy is strong enough to get through the competition. Tyra thinks she is. Twiggy charmingly says that Jade scared her. I feel you, Twigs. Miss J. says that Jade is a bit tranny, and that's why he loves her. Tyra notes that Jade's constant arrogance might mask some insecurity. No shit, Dr. Phil. Nigel says that if "conceited drag queen" is in, Jade might have a future in modeling. Tyra calls her La Jade. I call her La Cat Butt. Speaking of, Miss Itty says hi and that Jade is her alter ego.

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America's Next Top Model

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