The girls meet Patrick Dukes, the safety officer from the ship. This would be the perfect time to realize that someone is missing. And I mean, for all we know, they could have started out with thirty-five girls. In any case, it's time for a safety briefing! The safety briefing involves Miss J. modeling a life preserver. He tells them that sometimes being a model is all about working whatever you're wearing, and thus the girls are now going to have their first fashion show. Heather tells us that she's terrible at runway. She's also terrible at pronouncing runway, which she says as "wunray." Marvita tells us that she's been through a lot, and is basically homeless, so she's going to do whatever it takes to get into that house. Appearing on a reality show is a good way to get a bed and a hot meal, unless you go on Survivor. Big Brother would be an excellent option, too.
The girls walk down the "runway," which is a track of some sort, wearing their clothes plus a life preserver. There are sunbathers on both sides of the wunray, who are actually wishing that they'd gone missing right about now. There is a girl named Spontaniouse, pronounced "spontaneous," who walks with a big bubble butt stuck all out there. Miss J. does an imitation of her. She is 19, from Montgomery, Alabama, and says she can't help her big-ass Alabama butt. Neither can her sisters Impulsiffe and Spurofthemeaument and Thecondommebroke. Victoria, 20, tells us that she worked really hard in high school and got into the top history program at Yale University. But, she adds, she's never modeled before, and she has the fashion sense of a twelve-year-old boy. And, maybe, the face.













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