America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | 2 USERS: A+
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Shanghaijinx!

Back at the penthouse, there is Tyra Mail. "Tomorrow you will channel your inner queen, and let your beauty reign. Love, Tyra." Jenah thinks it might have something to do with dynasties. Oh, please let Heather and Bianca have to act out the Alexis Morell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan versus Dominique Devereaux catfight!

The models walk by people doing tai chi in the city on their way to the shoot. Jenah tells us that the models were told each girl should bring an outfit that describes her personality. I hope Bianca remembered to pack her coat made of puppies! The girls meet up with Jay Manuel and Brent Poer, the representative for Cover Girl. He tells the girls that they're going to be shooting a print ad and a commercial for the Cover Girl Queen Collection. Is it just me, or is the Queen Collection totally not for white girls? I mean, which, great, but I don't know how putting Chantal and Heather in black face is going to fly. "Every woman is a queen" is the new campaign for the Queen Collection. Wow, I wonder how many tries it took the ad department to come up with that one. "Every woman is...a fairy riding on the back of a unicorn? No, no, that's not quite it. Every woman is...a siren luring sailors to their doom? No, no, too literate. Wait, I think I've got it!" Anyway, today is all about the girls showing their real selves, and showcasing their inner and outer beauty. Hoo boy. The girls have to learn a script, but there's a place in it where they get to share something about themselves and make it their own. God, I hope nobody sleeps with a nightlight. Jay tells them to get it together and prove that they can be cover girls.

Lisa interviews that everything that made her strong in the competition has flown out the window, so she needs to step her game up. I hate to tell her, but sometimes it is pretty hard to come back from a crippling lack of self-esteem. The girls practice their lines in makeup. Heather tells us that she doesn't know why, but that every time she has to memorize lines, she chokes. If she's going to go farther in the competition, she says, she'll have to step up. Sutan helpfully advises the girls that every queen is not a woman, and Bianca tells him that he is the only exception. Chantal is sad about the fact that they have to wear their own clothes, probably because they all own crap clothes, while Lisa jokes that when they told the girls to be themselves, they didn't really factor in that she's from Jersey.

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America's Next Top Model

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