America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card
Potes: B | 3 USERS: A+
Another Brick In The Wall

Last up is Saleisha and her wig. As much as I hate her, I have to admit that her photo is pretty bad-ass. Nigel thinks it's fantastic, and that she overshadows the Great Wall. Twiggy agrees, and says that she looks beautiful. Tyra compliments Saleisha for putting her nerves into her work rather than letting them take her over, and adds that she didn't have to tell Saleisha much. She just came in and started jumping and Tyra was like, "Woo! Yeah! Go! Jump! Woo! Haiiah!" Per usual.

And then it's time to look at the group shot and determine who stands out the most. Twiggy says that to her eyes it's Jenah, and goes into a rapture about her piercing blue jewels of eyes. Nigel thinks that Chantal's is the strongest, and says it's the best picture he's seen of her looking directly into the camera. He poutily asks why Chantal can look at Tyra like that and not him. Maybe because Tyra's not creeping her out as much, Itzhak Pervman. Ann's eyes went right to Saleisha, who is holding the center of the photo. Tyra likes that Bianca looks like the guy in the photo, and that her eye is hooded and slanted. Well, that comes across as high praise, doesn't it? Tyra says that she had a clear idea of the standings before she shot the girls, but they performed in unexpected ways. With the halfhearted sense that anything can happen, we head to commercials.

And hey! Heather is the Cover Girl of the Week again! And she's not even on the show anymore!

Deliberations! Nigel thinks that Jenah has become dislodged, and it feels like she's defeated already. Twiggy asks if Jenah really wants to be a model. Jenah reminds Tyra of the girls who, when she was modeling in Paris, were so homesick that they'd cry and break down, leaving Tyra to ask where her friend Becky was. Some kind soul let her know that, "Girl, she went home. She couldn't handle it." Tyra thinks that Jenah almost gave her swan song, which prompts Miss J. to ask what a swan song is, and Tyra to reinterpret her own classic hit, "Shake Ya Body," as sung by an actual swan. It's very close to the original, if you ask me. Twiggy thinks that Bianca is the least natural model in the group, but Tyra thinks that Bianca's defense of her own learning curve was more convincing than Jenah's infamous swan song. Nigel thinks that there are many sides to Bianca, but she doesn't really know how to do it yet. Whether there's time for her to learn is a question. Ann thinks that Chantal is channeling her inner diva, and that her picture is strong. Miss J. says that Chantal normally looks like a boat show model. Saleisha is more high fashion than ever, and her photo is Twiggy's favorite. Ann thinks that Saleisha has more sparkle than Tinkerbell, but points at her photo and adds, "This is literally evil fairy dust." That is literally the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

The girls return and face their fates. Tyra says that the judges determined who was strongest in the group photo ...and it was Chantal! Oh, good for her. I'm just happy that it's not Saleisha. Chantal gets the group photo as a special prize, and she's still in the running to be America's Next Top Model. Saleisha is called next, which of course leaves Jenah and Bianca in the bottom two. Bianca has had a long journey, from Queens to the final four. She's shown that she can be a high-fashion model, but hasn't shown that she can perform without training wheels. However, her speech was very convincing. And then there's Jenah. A girl who's been strong from the start and takes fantastic photos, but who is also doubting herself and isn't sure who she is. The judges also felt that Jenah gave a swan song speech today. Oh, please, some of the judges didn't even know what a swan song was. In any case, Jenah gets the photo, and Bianca's out. Tyra tells Bianca that some girls have a natural ability to model, and they just do it. Bianca has a gorgeous figure, face and spirit, but she's not there in terms of movement and being natural. Tyra wants Bianca to go home and find friends and family who are photographers, and pose pose pose pose pose. And then hopefully an agency will sign her off of those simple snapshots. Perhaps if she gets Tyra to sprinkle some of the evil fairy dust on them, they will.

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America's Next Top Model




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