Tyra thinks Chantal is working on a half tank of gas and isn't living up to her potential. Bianca holds back and is self-conscious, says Tyra. She also looks like she is crawling through the screen to kill me. Bianca interviews that she was having a hard time, but that Heather was a mess, and that she thought Tyra was going to go off on her. However, Tyra loves what Heather is doing. It's true that Heather looks like she's going to come through the screen and eat me, then do a zombie dance. Bianca is outraged that Heather can do no wrong as we head to commercials.
When we return, Tyra yells, "Crawl!" and the girls crawl. We hear again how frustrated Bianca is with Heather's relative perfection. To wit, Tyra says that Heather has a certain awkwardness that, when Tyra gives her notes, turns into magic. She enjoys Heather's dark, mysterious, Tim Burton-esque sexuality. Ah, that famous Tim Burton-esque sexuality. It's why I always want to get nailed to the wall by Beetlejuice. Tyra's final advice to the girls is this: "Remember...be beautiful. And use your loveliness." Wow, that's helpful. It's like "Ask not what your country can do for you," but for dumb-asses.
Back at home, Lisa steps on the scale and announces that she gained a whole pound. She's been intercepting our care packages for Sarah! HANDS OFF THE SAUSAGE, SKELETOR. Bianca asks Lisa what size she wears, and Lisa says she takes a 0 or a 3 -- it depends on the pants. Okay, first off, Jesus. She's, like, six feet tall. And second, Lisa would do well to stop shopping in the juniors department. I'm just saying. Sarah interviews that she's around really skinny girls all day, and that sometimes when she goes to bed at night she doesn't feel as good as she did when she woke up. Bianca announces that she's the biggest girl in the house, and Sarah tells her not to even play that game. Oh, the irony that Bianca said that to the girl who actually IS borderline plus-size. And seriously, Sarah doesn't even look very much bigger than Bianca. It sucks. Sarah interviews that the size thing is awkward and weird, and that she's sick of talking about it. Poor Sarah.
Tyra Mail! Okay, and this is a riot. Heather is the first to see the Tyra Mail. She stands there and stares at it for a minute, then yells, "Guuuuuys?" No one responds. She tries, "Guuuuuuuuys," again, and again there's nothing. Finally, she yells, "Tyra Mail!" and the girls all come running up the stairs. Heather is so weird. I love her. The Tyra Mail says, "Musicians love models. Do you have what it takes to share the spotlight? Love, Tyra." Well, if all we've heard so far is any indication, Sarah can't share the spotlight because there'd be no room for anyone else.