Renee is up first. Jay tells her to go over the top and let him pull her back. So if she wants to do a Crocodile Hunter voice (RIP), she should go for it. And go for it she does! Her voice is to the nerves like a stingray is to the heart. And, she needs cue cards. She seems to do pretty well once she has them, and she also looks totally gorgeous. Next is Dionne. She's kind of a disaster. The Aussie accent is a wash, and she can't remember her lines. Jay says that he was wowed when Dionne first walked onto the set, but her performance was like one run-on sentence. A sheep baas its disapproval.
Jael interviews that the best part of this shoot is that she's surrounded by nature and is finally at home, and she gets to run free. I'm sorry, but they don't have "outside" in L.A.? Jay tells Jael to make her reading as conversational as possible and act like she's talking to someone. She seems to be having some difficulty, and she interviews that she struggled with the commercial because it was so over the top in "fake happiness." Jay does an awesome impression of Jael's jerky body language, which makes her crack up in a really unattractive way. He says that he loved Jael's energy, but they really struggled to get a good line read out of her.
And then sooner than you can say "Take 23," it's Take 23. It sucks just as much as the other ones, and Jay tells Jael that they're going to have her do reaction shots, which might be easier for her. Oh, burn! He thinks she's challenged. She gives a giant fake smile to the camera, and Jay tells her that there's no way he could use it, because, again, she looks challenged. She starts to tear up, and Jay says that he needs to fill her in on the harsh reality now, so that she can get to a good end result. She says that she feels like an idiot, because she's not the girl next door. She just wants to touch the grass and animals and breathe the air and climb the trees. Sounds like Jael needs to take a trip to Neverland Ranch. Jael tells Dionne that she wants to be up there dressed in all black leather whipping some boy's ass. The birds and trees and flowers love to watch that shit. The burgeoning squirrel bondage community would be especially pleased. FYI, the safe word is: "Nuts."
Jay loves Jaslene's hair, makeup, and outfit, because she looks just like Janice Dickinson in the Serengeti desert. He says that it's genius. Jaslene seems to be having a rough time at first, but Jay tells us that on her sixth take, she nailed the script without cue cards, which was impressive. Meanwhile, Brittany thinks she has her lines down. Jay talks to her and notes that she looks nervous, and she tells him all about the car accident and her memory being fucked. Jay kind of unsympathetically says that she's going to have to work through her shortcomings if this is what she wants to do. Brittany, who has the Tyra-esque wig head wrap, gets frustrated really easily. They bring her cue cards, which actually seems to make matters worse. She starts to cry. Jay tells her that if she lets emotion overtake her, it will defeat her. Brittany tearily interviews that it's frustrating to have something that happened five years ago still affect her so much, and to forget what she read on a cue card in two seconds. She says that it's hard to act all, "Tee hee!" when you're aggravated. Jay interviews that his biggest problem with Brittany was that she was totally overcome by her emotional scar and baggage. Her frustration with herself totally shattered her performance.