America's Next Top Model
The Girls Who Made It This Far

Episode Report Card
Potes: B- | Grade It Now!
Same As It Ever Was

And then there was tightrope walking. Of course. No one broke anything important, I'm sad to say. Melrose established herself as the "fiercest competitor," or maybe her beret somehow helped to balance her. Everyone was sick of her already, even at this early point. Monique says that Melrose acts like she's so perfect, but she's not. This jealous attitude translated back into their living situation, as there were many battles over the phone room. And then, in a never before seen catfight, they can't manage to cook over the same stove. Monique grabs something that I guess Melrose was using, and Melrose asks her what she's doing and says that she's so weird. Monique appears to be drinking a glass of chardonnay, which is a little suspect as she is only, like, eighteen. Melrose asks Monique if she has psychological problems, and Monique does that thing where she just repeats everything Melrose says right back to her. That is so annoying. Melrose asks Monique to leave because she's scaring her, and Monique just does that same thing. Monique is, like, aggressively psychotic.

And then GranolaGate Cycle 5's Bre herself comes back to take a look as the girls catwalk while wearing masks in a cobblestone courtyard. To the joy of Monique, Melrose stumbled, but her joy was short lived as she started to feel ill, and not just in the brain. She had temperature fluctuations and I guess just felt overall bad. Melrose calls it karma. Eugena notes that Monique is getting sicker by the hour, and she has to go to the hospital. She goes to the hospital and tries to make it to the next day's shoot, where she's obviously still not feeling well. Jay gives her the option to stay or go, and she chooses to leave, which is clearly a bad move. The other girls, meanwhile, have to walk on a tilty runway in the middle of a pool. Caridee's boob popped out, but this wasn't the biggest snafu of the evening since Eugena fell in the water.

And then there was a runaway bird. Mr. Bojangles! He probably thought he was with the girls from last cycle, given that he's blind and all.

Panel came down to Monique and Eugena, and clearly the fact that Monique missed the shoot got her sent home, much to the relief of the other girls. Monique thinks that she wasted her time there. Oh, but you've given the rest of us so much amusement! Don't think that your life is for no purpose, little one.

Meanwhile, Dani(elle) puts on bunny ears and poses in Central Park. Oh God, she's become a Furry! Stop sniffing the Wetslicks and come back to reality, honey.

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America's Next Top Model




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