Bring On Some Fresh Meat, Already
Anyway, like a bad case of recurrent shingles, the first predator in the concrete jungle is Yaya. Yes, Fucking Yaya. We get flashbacks of Yaya being pretty and compliant, which I think we can all agree is an unfair representation. Yaya says that since we first met her, she's had a lot of time to sit with herself and figure out what she wants to do. She says, "This is it. I'm an actor." Quick, someone notify the Academy. We see Yaya's Radio Shack commercial, in which she plays against type and acts like a spoiled jerk. She's also going to appear in the film Take The Lead starring Antonio Banderas, which seems to be a fictionalized version of Mad Hot Ballroom but with inner-city high-school kids rather than elementary or middle schoolers. She walks on the streets of New York, and she is wearing Ugg Boots, as several of the other girls in this special are. And Ugg boots are, of course, the world's most hideous shoe. I am particularly pleased to see Yaya wearing them several years after they've been declared over. Yaya tells us how excited she was to hear that she got the part in the movie. She was on the street and she screamed and jumped up and down, and then stopped because people were looking at her. But then she started screaming and jumping up and down again, because she's just so charming and spontaneous. She tells us more about her character in the movie, a student named Lahrette, and we see a few clips. Then she talks a lot about Antonio Banderas, and in a roundabout way intimates that she pretty much sucked on her first day and had a diva crying fit in the bathroom. But Antonio was there to calm her down. He was probably just so excited not to be looking at Melanie Griffith's puffy fish lips that he wanted the day to go on as long as possible. Yaya says that she's just going about her life and sometimes forgets that she's a recognizable face. But she never forgets how humble she is, on account of how people are always reminding her of it. She's very busy and hopes that her hard work will pay off. She says that it's less her hard work, and more the hard work of all the people who have paved the way. I guess she means like Adrienne and Yoanna. She hopes that she can make them proud. Oh, Yaya. You already have!