A Hole In The World

Episode Report Card
Strega: D | 2 USERS: B
We Don't Need Another "Hero"

Props to Exotic Mushroom and scrappinphool.

We open in an unidentified flashback to Fred getting ready to leave her suburban home for "the graduate Physics program at UCLA." It's the thematic equivalent of a Bulwer-Lytton opening. Her parents, Roger and Trish, are nervous about her leaving for the big awful city. Fred tells her dad, "I love you like pancakes." With lots of sweet, sweet syrup, right? Roger bitches about the big awful city. Fred says, "It's Los Angeles, the city of angels!" Roger retorts, "And if you meet one angel there, I'll eat the dog." Har dee har har. He bitches about the big awful city some more as he leaves. Fred and Trish talk about some mysterious Bethany person whom Fred will apparently be staying with when she arrives in the big awful city. Fred reassures Trish, and then rushes over to pack up "Feigenbaum," her -- and I'm not making this up -- beloved stuffed bunny rabbit. Just in case we harbored any illusions about Fred's emotional age. Or Whedon's. There's also a big white hat hanging on the wall. More on this later. Fred reassures her mom some more about how she's gonna study her little heart out, adding "And I'll be careful. I'll even be dull, boring. Cross my heart."

Cut to Fred incinerating wall-hugging demon eggs in a sewer with a blowtorch. Yeah, but this is subtle compared to what happens later. One egg starts to open up without Fred's spotting it. And then it explodes when Wesley fires a shotgun at it. Fred says, "We got the nest," and Wesley says that the others are finishing a sweep. Fred says that the demons "reproduce by vomiting up crystals that attract and mutate the microbes around them to form eggs." Wesley whispers, "Are you trying to turn me on?" I begin to suspect that this may not be as good an episode as it sounded from the summary. Fred says the roaring fire and "snug little nest" are romantic. They kiss while romantic music plays because WE WILL FEEL SAD LATER. We WILL. Obey, or Whedon will go house-to-house and kill our pets. Then we hear Angel complaining nearby, and Spicule replying, "It was on your back, what was I supposed to do?" Spicule enters, followed by Angel, who suggests, "Ask me to turn around?" Angel has a sword plunged through his torso, and from the side protruding from his back dangles a little dead demon. Aw, poor little dead demon. Weep for him! Weep, you bastards! Oh, wait, sorry, I got confused about who we're supposed to feel bad about. Bear with me. Angel says that Spicule just likes stabbing him, and Spicule retorts, "I much prefer hitting you with blunt instruments." Angel wheels and sniffs, "We only asked you along because we felt sorry for you!" Spicule tells Angel to stop whining, and starts to climb a ladder out of the sewer. Fred hurries over to Angel, and he reassures her that he's okay. Fred apologetically explains that she just wants to retrieve the dead demon: "Always like a new specimen!"

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