Angel
Billy

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Strega: C- | 2 USERS: A-
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Billy

Happy birthday to Johanna, and no love at all to Tim Minear and Jeffrey Bell. Tell the truth, guys: did Marti Noxon pay you to make "I Only Have Eyes for You" look good by comparison?

Previously on Angel, Fred didn't say that line for once, Lilah lost her personal brain trust, and Angel traded a barbecued bad boy for a creamy-complexioned Cordelia.

Angel stands right behind Cordy as he says, "Don't stiffen up." "You either," she replies as she raises a sword. Ugh. We're ten seconds in and already I feel ill. Angel's training Cordy to fight, you see. In the basement. The somewhat cramped, dark, rubble-filled basement. Not, say, the giant empty lobby. Angel coaches Cordy on how to "keep an attacker busy until..." Cordy stares at him and wonders, "Until he dies of old age? Or until you swoop in to save me?" She insists that she needs to know how to fight, and Angel sniffles because Cordy doesn't think he'd protect her. Cordy, bless her, has little patience with that, and says, "What if it turned out you were the guy I had to fight? It could happen." Angel doesn't have much response to that, and leads her through some of them sword-fighting moves. I like watching people wave swords around. Prettiness. Angel offers to go at half-speed until Cordy picks up the moves, but Cordy insists, "Three years of Varsity cheer squad -- I only ever had to be shown a move once." Angel claims this is different from "shaking a pompon." Cordy promptly calls out, "Ready? O! Kay!" and goes through the moves, ending by pinning Angel against the wall. "Go team," he chuckles nervously. Is training a novice with actual swords really wise?

At Wolfram & Hart, Lilah hurries along while berating a secretary: "You should have pulled me out of that meeting the minute you heard anything!" The secretary says that the family is on their way, and Lilah enters her office. Inside, she finds Gavin talking to the guy Angel freed from Skip's burning box. Gavin says he was keeping "young Billy" company. Lilah ignores him and starts yelling at Billy for his recent disappearance. As Gavin defends Billy, the discussion is interrupted by the entrance of Billy's uncle, Congressman Blim. I assume that "Blim" was selected as his name because it doesn't even have any of the same letters as "Kennedy." He thanks Lilah, saying, "This is the second time you've returned our nephew safely to us." As the Blims and their security team exit, Gavin smirks, "Our pleasure." Lilah makes a correction to the effect of, "'Our pleasure' in the sense that he had nothing to do with it." With their visitors gone, Gavin says that Billy's a nice boy. Lilah says, "He's great. Had his own private room in hell. Family connections." She adds, "Oh, by the way? Get out." Gavin says he isn't done, and Lilah tells him, "If you go sniffing around one of my clients again, I think we're gonna have a problem." Gavin asks, "Who told you [that] you could think? Why don't you try listening for a while instead of constantly flapping that fat mouth of yours?" Lilah giggles and makes fun of Gavin's debate skills. She turns away as she adds, "At least Lindsey knew how to --" She's interrupted when Gavin grabs her by the hair, throws her into some shelves, and proceeds to choke her.

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