Angel
Birthday

Episode Report Card
Strega: D+ | Grade It Now!
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Wes: Mostly Armless

Fred is showing the others a pile of MRIs and explaining the medical diagnosis. You know what? Fine. I give up. Fred knows everything: physics, obstetrics, hacking, neural biology. Problem with the Angelmobile? Fred's a mechanic! Money troubles? Fred's an economist! Can't understand the ethnic conflict in Serbia? Fred's a historian! Still having problems figuring out exactly what happened in Memento? Fred can explain it, and tell you interesting facts about the cinematography as well. Yessir, if there's some difficulty that a good dose of exposition will solve, Fred's your girl. Where was I? Fred's explaining that the MRIs show decreasing activity levels in Cordy's brain. Gunn announces, "Cordy's doctors couldn't explain it." Maybe she's been watching the show. And, hang on, they interviewed Cordy's doctors? And these medical professionals shared confidential medical information with some random clowns who showed up asking questions? Or maybe there's just a Post-It stuck on one of the MRIs that says, "Dear Cordelia -- We cannot explain this. Love, Your Doctors." Angel frets some more, but is interrupted when Cary enters, moaning. Cary's clothes are in tatters, and one horn is broken and dangling. Fred asks what happened, and Cary says that he can't talk about it. Gunn asks, "Then how we supposed to find 'em so we can kick their asses?" I'd complain again about Gunn's wildly varying feelings about demons, but I've decided it's easier to just pretend that "That Old Gang of Mine" never happened. Cary clarifies, "I mean I can't talk about it -- they cast a spell." Angel interrupts to ask if Cary learned anything, and Cary gets pissy because Angel isn't concerned about him. Because Cordy's life isn't nearly as important as Cary's wardrobe. Cary finally admits, "They didn't say I couldn't write it," and hands Angel a piece of paper. Well, whoever it was that Cary talked to, I think we can assume he's pretty stupid. As Angel heads out the door, Cary says, "Only a champion can deal with the Conduit." The Conduit? Great. I love important mystical powers that we've never heard of before.

It turns out that Cordelia and Skip have gone to the mall. Skip says that the Powers That Be thought she'd feel comfortable at a mall. Then he admits it's just a "construct of a mall, y'know, like in The Matrix." This leads to Skip enthusing that he loved The Matrix, and there goes another little shred of my respect for Skip. He directs Cordy's attention to an information screen, which displays not information, but a shot of Doyle from "Hero." Cordy watches as the screen shows Doyle kissing her, just before he was tragically killed by a clunky metaphor. Skip explains that Cordy wasn't meant to receive the visions, but The Powers That Be hadn't considered how Doyle felt about her. Cordy says that she thought TPTB knew everything, and Skip answers, "Life and death, that sort of thing, they've got a handle on. Who someone chooses to love? That's just good old free will." He explains that only demons can handle the visions, and calls out a girl named Tammy as his first witness. Tammy turns out to be a Renaissance Festival refugee with a bad perm and a cockney accent. She tells Cordy, "Town fathers called me a witch. They wanted to burn me at the stake." Luckily they didn't have to, because the back of her skull exploded first. She turns to show Cordy, then turns back so we can see the 'sploded-head wackiness. Maybe that explains her hair. Tammy advises Cordy to listen to Skip. Skip aw-shucks, "Get outta here." And then, more curtly, repeats, "Really. Get out. I've got work." Some people think the old jokes are the best jokes. I'm not so sure. Tammy turns and exits.

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