Angel
Deep Down

Episode Report Card
Strega: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Brine and Punishment

A light moves across Angel's casket. He blinks and twitches in the glare. Oh, the poor guy! I just realized that he's covered with water and he's all traumatized, but there's no room for him to fall down and twitch in that tiny box! That's why he's having all the bad dreams. When he gets out of there, he's going to have to spend a solid week twitching to catch up. The casket is hauled up to the surface and brought on board. Wesley cuts the lid open while Justine watches angrily. Honestly, I think you can assume that "angrily" describes everything Justine does. She's just that way. After removing the lid, Wesley cuts through the cables holding Angel while Justine snarks, "Congratulations, you're the big hero. Maybe your friends will throw you a party? I wonder what the cake's gonna look --" She's interrupted when Angel suddenly grabs Wesley by the throat. Oh Angel, I think Wesley's already made it clear that he's not into breathplay.

After the ads, Angel is still gripping Wesley's neck. But not very forcefully. Wesley pulls Angel's hand away and places it back in the casket while Angel's eyes flutter closed again. I think Wesley's going to develop a complex. I mean, I get tense about things touching my neck, and that's without people constantly making these kinds of attempts on my life. At the very least, I'd expect him to start wearing more turtlenecks.

Cut to Angel getting dumped on a table in the cabin. Wesley pulls out jars of animal blood and begins pouring the stuff into Angel's mouth. Many months ago, Thespis emailed me to say that the blood they use on the show is actually pure Strawberry Quik. Ew. For some reason, I'm more disgusted by that than I was by the pretend blood-drinking. I've been meaning to mention that for ages, though, and I always forget. So there's your trivia fact for the day. Anyway, Wesley quickly mutters something to the effect that "a vampire can go indefinitely without feeding, but damage to higher brain functions from prolonged starvation can be catastrophic." That was a whole lot of big words to mutter quickly. And this is Angel we're talking about, Wesley. I think worrying about his "higher brain functions" might be a bit over the top. As Angel gasps and gulps down the blood, Justine keeps being bratty: "He hates you. They all do. And they're never gonna take you back."

Connor returns to the Hyperion, where Fred and Gunn are waiting for him. Connor asks if this is "gonna be the yelling thing again." Fred says it won't, but Connor tells her that Gunn looks like he's about to yell. "I do not," Gunn says, and then Connor tells Fred, "He always looks like he's gonna yell." I wonder if Connor took a correspondence course in how to irritate parental figures, because he's awfully good at it. Sure, anybody would be irritated by the whole getting-locked-in-a-box trick...well maybe not anybody, but most people. However, talking about an authority figure as if he isn't there -- that's a pretty sophisticated irritation technique. Fred asks where Connor's been, and Connor gives the correct teenager's reply: "Out." The problem might be Gunn's pink shirt. I have a hard time taking Gunn seriously when he's wearing that. Connor heads for the stairs, and Gunn quietly says, "We were worried." At that, Connor looks guilty and apologizes. For a brief moment, they all get along, and then Gunn says exactly the wrong thing by comparing Connor's pig-headedness to Angel's. Connor instantly reverts to sullen and mouthy, insists that he's not like Angel, and stomps upstairs. Gunn and Fred have a quick parental conference about Alpha Males and "testing" and more insipid cooing from Fred and another single entendre. The phone rings, and Gunn wants to ignore it and keep smooching Fred, but he finally answers it. Because he's disciplined.

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Angel

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