Episode Report Card
Strega: B | 2 USERS: A+

Cut to Cordy's door being smashed in by Wesley and Angel. They swoop into the room, aiming crossbows and stakes at Harmony, who is sitting on the couch, painting Cordy's toenails. There is much confusion. Wesley says that Harmony's a vampire. Cordy knows. Wesley clarifies, "An evil vampire." "We covered that, too," Harmony insists. Cordy tells her rescuers, "Holster your guns, boys. She came to me for help. That's what we do, right? Help." Angel puts the stake away because he's jumping to "'O' is for 'obsequious,'" but Wesley refuses to be deterred. He says, "That's not your friend. That thing may have your friend's memories, her appearance, but it's just a filthy demon, an unholy monster!" After a moment, he tells Harmony, "Uh, no offense." Harmony blinks, "About what?" Wesley prepares to shoot, but Angel pulls the crossbow down: "Cordelia here feels that her friend doesn't pose a threat. I think we should respect her wishes." Cordy and Wesley both look at Angel suspiciously. Wesley finally says that they need Cordelia at the office, and she doesn't complain about her wet toenails before getting up. A cameraman is thoughtful enough to provide a close-up of the tattoo on the base of her spine. This angle also gives us what the show has been so desperately needing: a lingering shot of her ass. Jeez. Wesley wonders if she's going to leave Harmony there in her apartment, "risking [Cordelia's] neighbors' lives." Cordy insists that she trusts Harmony, but then Harmony says, "I don't wanna stay here alone with the ghost."

And then, as if Cordy's butt weren't enough, I pause the tape just in time to see an ad on TV now for a "Monster Booty" compilation album. The end of civilization is very, very close now, folks. Note to self: stock up on canned goods.

Back at the Hyperion, Wesley pages through his book while explaining that extensive research has turned up absolutely nothing about the snake in the triangle. He does, however, point out that "the triangle evokes pyramidal imagery." However did they get along without him? Harmony sits down next to him and pops a bubble in her chewing gum. Wesley is vexed. Angel asks Cordelia about the bird sculpture from her vision. Is that a Hopper print on the wall behind them? Nice. Cordy says she doesn't have any idea about the type of bird it was, adding, "For all I know, it was a duck." Wesley wonders if it's an idol, and Harmony pops her gum again and giggles about duck-worshippers. Hate mail pours in across the land from irate Duck Dodgers worshippers. Both of them. Trying to ignore the bimbo interruptions, Angel guesses that the bird is a landmark. Wesley says, "I suggest --" but on hearing another bubble popping, finishes the sentence, "--someone put a stake through that woman's heart if she persists on popping her bloody chewing gum!" Cordelia asks Harmony to ditch the gum, and Harmony does so, ripping a page out of Wesley's book and wrapping the chewed gum in it. Wesley flips. Cordy tries to smooth things over by saying that Harmony didn't do it on purpose, which isn't exactly true. Harmony doesn't do herself any favors by agreeing, "That's right. And I could've, 'cause, you know, I am evil." Wesley calmly reaches into a desk drawer, pulls a stake out, and is restrained by Cordy. Angel pulls Harmony out of the line of fire and pours her a mug of blood. I was going to say, "Ew, she's drinking it cold!" but it's not like it's less gross if it's warm, so never mind. Harmony says that the blood tastes funny, and Angel explains that it's pig's blood. Harmony, exasperated, says, "Well that's gonna go straight to my hips." She asks Angel how he can resist the craving for human blood, describing the sensations in great detail until Angel widens his range all the way to "tempted." Then Gunn enters, cutting off the reverie. Gunn greets Harmony with interest while she pours about a cup of sugar into her pig's blood. Cordy introduces Harmony, and Wesley cattily adds, "It's all right to speak freely in front of her. She's a vampire." Gunn draws back, looks at Angel, and wonders, "Don't we kill 'em anymore?" Gunn says that robed vampires have been snatching people for the past month. Cordy wonders why they haven't heard about this sooner, and Angel notes, "We've all been a little bit distracted lately." Gunn says, "Or maybe we haven't heard because not a lot of bodies are turning up." Wesley guesses that the vampires are "building an army." But why?

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