Episode Report Card
Strega: D | 4 USERS: C+

Angel says he's sorry about Caritas, but insists that they have to find Fred. Cary goes on a little rant about how he's not a "mystical vending machine, here to spit out answers every time [Angel] waltz[es] in with a problem." Yes, he is. Hasn't he seen the show? He asks why no one cares about his destiny, and keeps on complaining until Angel realizes that Cary is stalling. He asks whether Cary knows where Fred is. Cary responds by asking, "How do they get the pimentos in the olives? There's a mystery for you." He goes on like that for a while, but eventually gives up and says that Fred has reasons for avoiding her parents. He asks why Angel wants to "force a showdown." Angel points out that the Burkles aren't going to give up until they find Fred, and at least the MoG can help protect Fred this way. Cary finally gives in, but warns, "Play this one delicately, bro, cause it's gonna get messy." What the hell is he talking about now? If he's talking about Fred, there's a few tears and then everyone happily reconciles. If he's talking about the stupid bugs, there's no reason to make it sound so dire. I might be able to accept it if he was smirking a bit, because then I'd figure he was deliberately misleading Angel just to pay him back a little for the trashed club. But as it is, I just see the writer playing the audience for suckers at the characters' expense. Lesson five: do your best to make sure that the story becomes more nonsensical with repeated viewings.

We cut to a bus station. Fred is sitting on a bench next to a scruffy differently-residing man. Fred is, of course, giving herself a little pep talk. "I can just get right up on that bus and be a whole new person. Like origami. Or plastic." No, I have no clue what she means. She continues, "Move someplace I never been with no money, no friends, no job. Easy as pie!" As she starts reciting pi, the man gets up with his various bags and shuffles away. Fred sadly explains that she was "just calculating pi to relax. I'm not dangerous." The guy ignores her and leaves, and Fred keeps on chatting to herself. She decides she could go to Vegas and play blackjack. "Memorized 452 consecutive digits of pi, a few hundred measly cards should be easy." Hey, she wasn't calculating pi at all, she had it memorized! Cheater. Behind her, we see Angel and...well, everybody enter the bus station and fan out to look for Fred. Fred looks up and sees her parents just as they spot her. She jumps up and runs toward the door, yelling, "No, you're not here! Go away!" The MoG surround her, and Fred stops and looks around as her parents rush to her. Fred cries, "You can't be them. You're not them, 'cause they don't know." Roger and Trish keep insisting that they are her parents, and Fred keeps denying it. She finally bursts out with the big non-dramatic non-revelation, which is, "It was just a story with monsters, not real, not in the world! But if you're here and you see me, then...then it's real, and it did happen. If you see what they made of me. I didn't mean to get so lost." Once again, this is exactly how I felt in high school. Well, not really. Um. Maybe just a little bit. Gosh, if Fred is this screwed up about her experiences, it's going to take some sensitive work to resolve her problem. Like, Trish will have to hug Fred, and everyone will need to cry a bit more, and Trish will need to say, "We'll make it all right." And Roger should probably says something like, "Everything's okay now." Luckily that's just what happens. Problem solved! Except for the giant CGI praying mantis that drops from the ceiling, of course. Lesson six: when the audience is about to turn off the television in disgust, grab their attention with special effects!

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP