Episode Report Card
Shack: B | 1 USERS: B+
Wesley vs. Darth Burger

In any event, who cares? Connor's dead! Sing a happy song and dance about! Set off firecrackers in your driveway! Gorge yourself on Black Forrest cake! Get drunk and have sex with a stranger! Throw a champagne flute into your fireplace! Shoot your AK-47s directly into the air with absolutely no concern where the bullets may land! Connor's dead! The horrible little creature is...

...Aw, CRAP! It was just a dream. Wesley was just dreaming after he fell asleep at his desk. Connor's not a demon, not yet a sandwich. The folks at Mutant Enemy still know how to mess with our heads. Seduced and abandoned yet again. Angel comes in holding the nasty little plot-eater, looking more concerned and less dorky. He asks whether Wesley's been there all night. Wesley looks confused, as usual.

Credits. I really like the theme song for Angel. Don't tell anyone. The Verizon ad is back. Since Strega missed it last week, I'll recap. Right after the final shot in the credits of Angel walking down a dark alley, we see the Verizon guy at the entrance of that same alley on his cell phone, asking the person on the other end, "Can you hear me now?" He wanders through the dark lobby of the Hyperion and into the elevator, repeating the question. I'll pay money for Angel to eat him, too, even though he has the exact level of nerdiness that I find alluring. Shut up.

We return from commercials to a close-up of a crying, fussy baby. Now they're just rubbing it in. We're in a hospital waiting room; two women, each with a baby to call her own, are whining about how hard it is to get their colicky kiddies to go to sleep. I find giving them a nice dry-cleaning bag to nuzzle helps. Suddenly, we hear Angel's voice ask, "Have you tried the vacuum?" Angel's there with Connor, and Wesley's with them because Connor has two daddies or something. I don't know. I guess Wesley thinks that there's something he could actually do if Angel tries to eat Connor. Perhaps stammer and trip over something? That's what he usually does. Angel and the women blather on about vacuums and white noise, and I don't care and neither should you. The women are impressed by Angel's parental skills, and one of them calls him "Mr. Dad." The joke (and the movie) is "Mr. Mom." I mean, wouldn't you expect a dad to be a mister? After one of the women gets called away, Angel dorks out and brags to Wesley that they called him "Mr. Dad." Angel strikes me one of those dads who expects a parade every time he wipes the baby's nose while actually only participating in 10% of the baby's care. Wesley, on the other hand, is still unkempt and unshaven and looks like the parent who wanders around the house in a bathrobe because all his clothes have baby vomit on them, but he never has time to do the laundry because little Connor needs his formula right now or he's going to die from screaming until his heart bursts. Angel finally notices that Wesley looks like crap and asks him if he's okay. Wesley morosely tells him that he's working on a difficult translation. Angel asks Wesley if he's found out anything about Connor that they should be worried about. Before Wes can respond, a nurse interrupts them to call in "Mr. Angel." I wonder what he gave them for a first name? When I see them in the hospital, I wonder all sorts of things, like whether Connor has health insurance, and if so, how did he get it? What did they do when the hospital asked for a family medical history? Does Connor have a social security number? I'm sure they doctored stuff up for Connor. Fred probably did it, because she can do anything! Except shut up.

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