Angel
Angel

Episode Report Card
Strega: B | 821 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Offspring

Previously on Angel...oh good grief, we're back to explaining who Cary is, now? Cordelia suggested we imagine what might have happened if Angel had sex with Darla. If you imagined he'd break some more doors, you're right. Angel said he'd have to kill Darla the next time he saw her. A shaman told Darla that "this is not meant to be," which just shows the kind of nasty bigotry some people have against unwed vampires having babies. And Darla decided to "visit Daddy," forcing thousands of viewers to rush headlong into denial.

It's 1771 in Rome. A rat scurries about in a sewer system that bears a startling resemblance to the one under Los Angeles. Angel runs past, and then stops as he sees robed figures carrying torches. He tries a different way, is trapped again, and finally pulls a grating open. His hair is pulled back tidily, instantly making this the best flashback ever. Once in the new tunnel, Angel neatly puts the grating back to discourage pursuit, and promptly trips and tumbles down the inclined tunnel, crashing out into a room of some kind. Ha! Definitely the best flashback ever. Several men aim crossbows at Angel, and he backs away. Then doors are opened and light blazes in, so I guess we're not underground at all. This is just a building that's been built with round hallways. And gratings instead of doors. Maybe it's in the side of a hill? Holtz gallops inside. Well, the horse he's riding gallops inside. It also rears dramatically to show the high ceiling, before Holtz dismounts. He's wearing tinted glasses, because he's cool like that. The horse is then led back outside, so Holtz really was just determined to make a dramatic entrance. Holtz walks over to the part of the room Angel and his captors are in, which has a much lower ceiling. Ancient Roman architects were clearly demented. That'll teach them to use lead cooking utensils. Holtz and a red-robed Monsignor have a subtitled chat for the purpose of reminding us that Darla and Angel murdered Holtz's family. Then Holtz reminds Angel of the same thing in English. Oh, fun trivia fact: Mrs. Holtz's first name was Caroline. Meanwhile, minions have wrapped a chain around Angel, binding his arms to his torso. And leaving his legs free, because it's not like he might run or kick. Holtz tells Angel that the Monsignor was excommunicated, adding, "the order he belongs to, Inquistori, adheres to the old beliefs." You know times are tough when they start laying off monks. Or is that laity-ing off? Sorry. Holtz cheerfully notes that the ex-monks still enjoy a good torturing, and says, "Let's get started, shall we?" He picks up a big poker-looking thing with a curved tip, and moves it toward Angel's neck. Angel screams as the camera discreetly turns away.

Angel