Angel
Untouched

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Untouched

If you never watched the show before, the "previously on Angel" snippets would tell you that there's a woman named Lilah who works for a company called Wolfram & Hart, who was pleased to meet a girl named Darla, who sometimes rolls around on a bed with some guy with strange hair. I have no theories as to how that knowledge would help you.

It appears to be after hours at Wolfram & Hart. Lilah sneaks into Lindsey's office. He's got a nice desk. And a very strange lamp, which seems designed to illuminate itself, and not much else. Lilah starts poking around at the papers on the desk. I suddenly realize that he doesn't have a computer. A moment later I remember that his typing probably isn't too good anyway, and giggle madly to myself. Darla suddenly says, "Exciting, isn't it?" startling Lilah into dropping the papers she was holding. Apparently, Lilah totally forgot that Darla existed. Wish I could. Darla steps out of the shadows in one of her trademark red dresses and continues, "Going through their things, all the hidden pieces of themselves locked away, giving you a naughty little thrill of control." The stuff Lilah was looking at wasn't hidden or locked away, but I think Darla's the type of gal who just likes saying "naughty." Lilah explains that she likes "keeping abreast" of Lindsey's latest project, and says that Lindsey's probably going through her own office right now. Darla rubs purple dust into her palm while Lilah wonders, "Calynthia powder? Is that how you keep Angel sleeping when he's with you?" Darla sighs, "No, I just speak very slowly to him in this breathy little-girl voice, and his brain immediately shuts down due to lack of input." Well, she doesn't really say that, but she doesn't have to, does she? I'm zoning out myself as she goes on, "There's nothing so lovely as dreams. Everything's in them. Everything hidden. Open those chambers and you can truly understand someone. And control them." Lilah asks what Darla's found in Angel's "secret chambers." Darla grins, "Horrors." I think Darla's thinking of what's under Angel's shirt.

A blipvert whisks us to Angel being startled awake as Darla's drone finally fades out. Pajamas. Please give him pajamas. Cut to him wandering downstairs to the sound of Wesley and Cordelia bickering. It's a wonder the guy ever manages to stay awake. Cordy is calling Wesley a sheep, because he gets all of his opinions out of books. Eh? "At least I've opened a book!" Wesley shoots back. Cordy says she was in the top ten percent of her class. "What class? Advanced bosoms?" Wesley wonders. Cheap shot, but given the fact that Cordelia's cleavage is particularly emphasized by her butt-ugly halter top, I can't blame him. I can, however, blame him for wearing an olive green tie with a blue and white striped shirt. With these two around as examples of fashion gone wrong, I can't blame Angel for sticking to basic black. Angel asks why they're arguing. Cordy says they were discussing whether or not they should pay Gunn. Wesley adds that after three minutes, their discussions turn into "name-calling and hair-pulling." Cordy claims that Wesley is cheap. Wesley says that Gunn might be insulted if they offered to pay him. "He's a proud sort of fellow," Wesley says, his tone conveying how alien this notion of "pride" is to him. As if we couldn't tell that from his clothes.

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Angel

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