Bachelor Pad

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LuluBates: A+ | 1120 USERS: B-
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Pants Off Dance Off

That night Tenley and Kiptyn must make their Big Decision. Natalie makes her plea for the money. In short, if she and Dave get the money they could move to the same city and bathe in THEIR swimsuits whenever they want. Elizabeth and Kovacs make their own pitch: They have never won a competition. Yep, that's their big selling point. They suck. Tenley and Kiptyn have the sads because no matter who they choose they are sending home a friend who will never forgive them and will send flaming bags of dog poo and rancid Edible Arrangements for the rest of their lives and then to their funerals too. Finally it is time for Tenley and Kiptyn to choose their competition. Tenley is crying too hard to talk, so Kiptyn plays toastmaster. He wants to thank everyone for making such a great competition even though, in reality, there was no competition at all. Kiptyn announces that they would like to extend an offer to Natalie and Dave. Also, a timeshare, but they can talk about that later.

Elizabeth turns on the waterworks and Kovacs comforts her. Harrison invites them to say their goodbyes. They fake hug their fake friends and then are sent off in separate limos. Keeping up appearances and all. Elizabeth claims she chose love over money although she would have loved the money to fix her bad boob job. In the other limo, Kovacs marvels that he was looking for money and found like instead. Isn't reality funny? Back inside the mansion, Chris Harrison announces that they are all being evicted from the mansion because they are bug bombing the place. Next time the couples meet will be in front of a live studio audience. I was hoping for a dead one, because this show can only be improved by the addition of zombies.

Bachelor Pad

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