Bachelor Pad

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Pants Off Dance Off

It's the show that never ends. It just goes on and on, my friends. Some people started watching, not knowing what it was and now they can't watching because it's the show that never ends it just goes on and on, my friends. Some people started watching, not knowing what it was and now they can't watching because it's the show that never ends it just goes on and on, my friends. Some people started watching, not knowing what it was and now they can't watching because it's the show that never ends it just goes on and on, my friends. Some people started watching, not knowing what it was and now they can't watching because it's the show that never ends it just goes on and on, my friends ...Yes, it's the season finale of Bachelor Pad. Can I get a HELL YEAH?

Elizabeth, Kovacs, Dave, Natalie, Kiptyn, and Tenley are all shocked, stunned, and seemingly brain damaged over the fact that they have made it. They are the final six contenders. While on most shows "Final Six" isn't usually anywhere near the end of the competition, luckily ABC has better and far more successful shows to get on the airways. So they are going to take this show back behind the barn and shoot it in the head. Yes, tonight's the last episode! The big banana! The last hurrah! The final chance to catch an STD through your TV. Aren't you giddily happy? Do you need new underwear? Before any of the Final Six can get too happy, they are all shot with synchronized tranquilizer guns and knocked out for the night. The next morning Chris Harrison wanders into the kitchen where everyone is groggily mating and making coffee. He announces that today's competition is the Most Important. Whoever wins guarantees themselves a spot in the championship.

Also, we will be having a cross promotion with another more successful ABC show, namely Dancing with the Stars. The couples are all overjoyed at the chance to show they have the dancing skills to match a a merengue dancing dog, the comedic self awareness of Cloris Leachman or at least, the bland white bread don't-embarrass-yourself-Pavelka of Bachelor Jake. Well, everyone except Kiptyn who has a case of the stage frights because Tenley was a semi-professional tap, jazz, and ballet student at the All That Jazz Dance Studio in the strip mall next to the Sizzler. He is just SO worried that he will fail her on the dance floor much as he has undoubtedly shamed her and his family in the bedroom. What? There is no way a guy named KIPTYN is good in bed. It's impossible.

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Bachelor Pad

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