Here's where I like the fact that the worst performer will get an automatic vote against them for the Rose Ceremony: it ensures that they have to try at least a little bit and will keep the gay panic to a minimum. They get juuusst enough laughing in at how ridiculous it is to make sure no one will accuse them of being, YOU KNOW, FRUITY, and then get down to the serious business of waving a ribbon around in the air. Dave in particular is taking it seriously, because he's worried about old money voting out the new money. On the women's side, Donna figures she has an advantage because she started doing gymnastics when she was eight. I do think that her boob job means her center of gravity has changed a LOT since then. Blakeley and Jamie are also performing well and are her chief competition.

And then the contestants are shown the costumes they'll have to wear. Ah, there's the gay panic. I would encourage any of the contestants to watch gymnastics at the Olympics; they will see athletes who can kick their asses without breaking a sweat. Many of the women are equally dismayed by the outfits they have to wear, mainly because we're reminded you don't see a lot of gymnasts with breast augmentation. However! Once the women stop bitching and get on their leotards, they look rather cute. And then the men come out in their singlets and Sarah says she kept looking at their penises.

And the judges are Ashley and J.P., who have not broken up yet, which helps the Bachelor/ette/Pad franchise illustrate the maxim that even a stopped clock is right twice a day, and then a U.S. gymnastics Olympic medalist whose name I won't put here so that it doesn't turn up on Google searches because I'd hate for her kids to someday find out she was on Bachelor Pad, for any reason. Erica R. thinks it's outrageous that a gymnast should be judging gymnastics, I guess.

The women go first, and as much as I hate rhythmic gymnastics, I would easily rather watch people who are good at it. Reid calls it the least graceful thing he's ever seen, and Kalon can't believe how bad it is because all women have to be good at is shopping and gymnastics. Kalon's embracing of his supposed villain status is hilarious if only because of how much he and the show have overestimated how much people actually care.