Bachelor Pad
Season 3, Episode 5

Episode Report Card
Daniel: F | Grade It Now!
Deus Ex Bachelor Pad

So then the date package arrives for Kalon, and it's got a diamond-and-sapphire bracelet and diamond earrings for Lindzi (whom Kalon picks to accompany him) and a Bentley key for him. Blakeley says she's pretty jealous, but kept smiling to pretend she wasn't, even though we see her lose her shit and say "Really? Really?" in front of everybody.

Still, she figures if that's what the non-overnight date gets, the overnight one must be amazing.

So we get all the fun of watching Kalon and Lindzi driving and listening to the pre-programmed GPS leading them to their destination, which turns out to be a bridge that's been blocked off and set up for a romantic dinner, complete with a chandelier, and I guess this kicks off the Kalon character rehabilitation and we're supposed to care that he's happy he and Lindzi have found each other. "Finding you is the most pleasant surprise I could ever have dreamed of," he tells her. And he is "possibly, maybe, potentially, perhaps" in love with Lindzi, instead of forcing it like he had to with Emily, like how romantic to tell Lindzi that he had to "force it" when he was dating another woman on his previous reality show. Lindzi also likes Kalon, and maybe Lindzi should be checked for some sort of traumatic brain injury that scrambled her senses.

Back at the house, Chris is whining about how everyone doesn't see how awesome he is, and scenes with Kalon and Lindzi cuddling and kissing are intercut with Chris deciding to target Lindzi as "payback" for Kalon. Guess it didn't take long for him to start thinking of himself as some kind of manipulative mastermind again.

Tony's getting ready for his date, and seems to mistakenly think Blakeley's anger at Chris and her choosing of the overnight date means she's totally into Tony. He says she's easily the hottest woman in the house by far, and he thinks they've been growing closer.

The date card arrives, and I'm somewhat confused by the fact that Blakeley chose Tony and now he has to pick Blakeley again to come on the date with him? Are they going to go on two dates?

This date also has keys -- Tony tosses them to Kalon to see if they're for a helicopter -- that turn out to be for a jeep waiting for them outside. While Sarah finds mean-spirited satisfaction out of the fact that Lindzi got jewelry for a date in a Bentley with a millionaire, Blakeley only gets a map and a Jeep on a date with a lumber salesman. Erica, however, figures the Jeep is right up Blakeley's alley, since she's so trashy what with the tattoos and the Hooters job and all. Well, not everyone can pay for breast implants and a socialite's life with a parental allowance, Erica.

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Bachelor Pad




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