"The fact that Ryan and I could just relax and enjoy each other's company really means a lot to me," Trista tells us. "Because it's something that I think we would do a lot in the future if he ends up being the one." Oh, you think? Spending the rest of your life with someone might mean "hanging out" is on the docket? Well then, bring on the monogamy with the big-ass cheesecake they're eating, 'cause if this is love, I'm hungry to try it!

Monogamy is for me/ I'm hungry to try it/ They'll be so full in love/ They won't even have to diet. There. Haven't written a Ryan couplet in a long, long while. That one felt good.

Really bizarrely porn-y music plays as they kiss and coo uncomfortably (for me, anyway), and Ryan offers to sleep on the couch. But Trista sends him packing, noting that "absence makes the heart grow fonder," which he dismisses somewhat cleverly as "rumor." She laughs. She's exhausted. She bids him a kiss-y goodbye, Ryan telling us, "I don't want to go home tonight." At the door, he whispers a breathy "Thanks again for having me." Oh, you only wish she had. As Ryan walks down the path of shame and out of sight, Trista voices over, "I think that I need to think about how my life would be with Ryan and Charlie. Because I think my life would be very different with both of them." I think it would be too, as it would entail breaking the applicable laws of most of the contiguous states. Perhaps you meant to say, "I think my life would be very different with each of them." Because this is clearly the time to diagram. She continues on that there's a "battle going on" inside of her as she tries to decide between the "dreamer" and the "realist." Trista? Thus quoth Christopher Cross: the best that you can do is fall in love. The best that you can do. The best that you can do. The best that you can do. Is fall in love.