Bachelorette
Bachelorette

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: A+ | 742 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Cold!

Ali's 100 percent positive she made the right choice for both herself and Kasey, but taking off and leaving him there, quote, "sucks," unquote. She adds that it made it hard to celebrate with Justin. Also, she doesn't like Justin either, so there's that. Meanwhile, down on the frozen landscape below, Kasey walks off into his own personal Jack London story. Justin congratulates himself and correctly says it was Kasey's own fault, which you'd think would make Justin seem more humble but somehow does just the opposite. He adds that there were two roses given: "One for Justin and one for Rated R." Coincidentally, what I shout at the TV in response to that is also rated R.

Pre-Rose Ceremony, the remaining eight bohunks (all in suits or dress shirts except for Kirk in his half of the matching sweater set, like, you have a rose, dude, don't look so desperate) talk about Kasey's elimination. Ali joins them and pays some lip service to Kasey before Frank steps up at the first opening -- which isn't even an opening, really -- and takes her upstairs for some one on one time. They talk about yesterday's group date, and she says she doesn't know who she'll end up with. "I do," Frank quips, and earns himself a hug. Then there's some making out, and Frank looks like he's about to cry, or having an allergy attack. That's what Ali was looking for. She'll probably end up ripping his heart out, but she wants to see it first.

Down below, Craig talks about being more nervous than he's ever been. But then he gets some alone time with Ali, and what does he talk about? How they haven't had much alone time. Then he moves on to talk about how he wanted to do something special for her, and starts unbuttoning his shirt cuff. Yes, he totally went there; he drew a tattoo on his arm to mock Kasey. Ali isn't too guilt-ridden about leaving Kasey to freeze to death in the wilderness to join in the mocking.

Chris N. totally face-plants, to the point where the guys down below can see that he's striking out, just from Ali's body language. It's so painful to watch you wonder how he got this far. I mean she asks him to open up, tell her some secret or guilty pleasure, and all he can come up with is "I like Mexican food." He hauls her into a hug, which she can't escape from fast enough.

Now it's Chris N.'s turn. When she asks about the whole Cape Cod thing, he says he doesn't care where they are as long as he's with her. Because that's not a recipe for resentment down the line or anything. He can't wait for her to meet the family. He talks about how he wants to be as good a husband as his dad is. Big hug. Mr. N. must be quite the hugger.

Bachelorette

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