Bachelorette

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Daniel: D | 972 USERS: C+
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Ed's Dead, Baby. Ed's Dead.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Then she asks him where he sees himself at 35, and he talks about having a nice house and a wine bar and a wife and kids. She talks about wanting kids in the next few years, and asks if that scares him, and he says it doesn't, which she can't believe, and it's too bad that Jillian doesn't realize that it's probably a good idea if a man doesn't buy into stupid Maxim stereotypes of refusing to commit, and then he asks her about leaving Vancouver, and she babbles about wanting to put her life in someone else's hands for a change, and despite the fact that Jillian has talked non-stop over the season about how great it would be to have one of these hunky guys take care of her, Jesse raves about how independent she is. She's the total package, he tells us, and he even loves her voice, and all I can say is try watching her on television for two hours every week, and see if you still enjoy her slightly hoarse babbling after that. Jesus, he's even telling her that she could have a radio show and people could listen to her and fall asleep, and calls it "sweet, sexy and raspy," and to her credit, she can't believe anybody would find it sexy because it sounds like she's been drinking whiskey all her life. Heh. Jesse tells us it's "arousing," which is a little more information than I think anyone actually wanted.

Back at the lodge, the guys are doing the traditional "slag off the potential relationship between the bachelorette and her current date" thing, and Ed kinda looks like hell and alludes to the problems that he's having and says he likes her a lot. "I could absolutely picture my life with Jillian," he tells her, and it's tough for him to know she's out getting to know someone else.

Speaking of someone else, Jesse and Jillian are now getting into the hot tub, and Jillian can't believe where she went on her date, and who she was with, and Jesse says he thinks she would have had just as good a time with anybody else, which she denies, and he says he's trying to prove to her that he's the right one for her, and she pretends that all she cared about was having a good time there with him, and if she wanted someone else to experience it, that person would have been there with them. Yeah. Because the producers said to her, "For this date, you're going to play in the snow on a glacier. Who are you taking?" and Jillian actually factored in "glacier date" when picking who to go with. She came up with ten criteria, rated each criterion out of ten for every guy, totaled up the scores, and Jesse came up tops on glacier-date compatibility.
Bachelorette

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