Anyway, Ashley runs crying to her brother who agrees that Chrystie is a total bitch and didn't give the guy a chance. Chrystie seems to realize that she should have actually TALKED to J.P. before trying to ruin his chances with Ashley decides to actually talk to J.P. First thing she says? Not hi or hello or lovely weather we're having, but: I told Ashley I don't think you guys are right together. J.P. -- who has probably watched enough seasons of the show to know that these family visits are usually total bullshit whitewashes with a nice pat on the back and a firm handshake -- is taken aback. Elsewhere on the island, Ashley is talking to her straight-talking stepdad who tells her to follow her heart and ignore her mean sister. Back on the hot seat, J.P. is taking a licking from Chrystie. She doesn't see it and no matter what he says to try and convince her that he and Ashley have a deep, meaningful, and surely lasting relationship, she won't buy it. In her words all she sees is a much older guy and wonders "What does he want with my much younger sister?" Which: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH. That may be the best thing ever said on this show. J.P. has gone from "taken aback" to "shocked and horrified." His mouth gawps a few times. What is the age difference between these two? I kinda thought they were the same age. Does that mean J.P. looks young for his age or that Ashley isn't the spry 49-year old I think she is?

But Chrystie's not done: She thinks Ashley is too much for J.P. She's too much! And J.P. is too old to change. He's set in his ways. He's a crotchety curmudgeon who needs a glass of warm milk and his pipe and slippers every night at 7 PM or ELSE. J.P. tries to defend himself, but Chrystie, who I LOVE, just shrugs and says, "I don't feel it." Then she adds the kicker: She thought Ashley showed more of herself when she brought freakin' BRAD WOMACK home. J.P. is stunned into silence with that one. Actually, I think all of America was stunned by that proclamation. J.P. stumbles off after that and goes to find Ashley. She swears that her family loves him, except obviously her sister, but maybe Chrystie's ragging it or something? Ashley tries to tell J.P. not to worry, but he's all, "Fuck that, I have nothing to do between now and the time I'm supposed to propose to you. I'm going to worry." Ashley tries to convince him that it's all good and she only values her sister's opinion a little bit, but he doesn't believe her. Would you? No you would not. As J.P. walks off into the sunset he swears that if this changes Ashley's feelings towards him, then he is totally not proposing to her. Um, J.P.? If Ashley changes her feelings towards you then you don't NEED to propose. Just sayin'.