Bachelorette
Season 8, Episode 4

Episode Report Card
Daniel: A | 1 USERS: A+
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Ego Tripping

He rants on at a very confused Emily about how when he's upset about what someone says to him he's going to say so. It's eating at him to the extent that he asks to speak to Doug outside and demands to know why Doug thinks he's the better man for Emily. "I never said I was," says a slightly befuddled Doug. "But you think you are," says Chris. Uh, Chris, since I'd imagine you think you're the better man for Emily, what exactly is the issue here? Isn't that the point of a competition?

Inside, the other guys start gathering at the windows, probably hoping that someone's going to lose some teeth. Doug points out, not inaccurately, that Chris is "kinda being immature right now," which Chris proves, much to Doug's amusement, by using the phrase "grown-ass man." Doug asks why Chris is "coming at" him right now. "I just want to let you know, man," says Chris. "Let me know what?" asks Doug, barely able to keep from cracking up. "I'm never, ever going to stand down to you," says Chris, and Doug laughs again and tells him Chris doesn't get his competitive juices going at all.

Doug's laughter clearly isn't the reaction Chris was expecting -- that would be "cowering terror" -- and so he whines some about how Chris somehow "overpowers" everybody, but at the same time is "over-the-top humble." He insinuates Doug has something to hide. "I don't believe half the shit you say. That's something that kinda pisses me off," says Chris (side note: thanks to evil duo @tknott356 and @hpatt15, I now can't NOT see Chris as an eagle). There's no end to the amusement Doug's finding in Chris's incoherent and vague accusations, and eventually Chris just gets up and stomps off. Doug shakes his head and takes a sip of his drink.

For maybe the first time ever, I wanted to spend a little more time at the cocktail party, but we're on to the rose ceremony, although first, to fill time, we get one of those sit-downs with Chris Harrison that isn't worth recapping at all, apart from "Jef" not kissing her despite two opportunities. "Maybe he's just not that into me," she says. Also, she thinks Ryan is a little manipulative. "I love how candid you are," says Harrison. I will say that I could forever do without someone deciding to go on The Bachelor/ette and then whining about having to eliminate contestants every week.

OK, now we're at the Rose Ceremony, and Chris says that what's even more incredible than Bermuda is the guys' relationship with Emily, and can I just ask what kind of drugs is Chris Harrison on that make him spout such nonsense?

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